Mumble 1

Mumble 1 is the first of the Mumble chats involving Chris which took place on 31 January 2009. 40 minutes long, Chris mostly goes on about video games. Gems include the thought that incest is okay if there are two women, and stuff about the Nintendo trip.

Summary

• Info for Chris' Room map: L shaped lego CWCville
• Chris admits to his family being pack rats
• IT WAS A BARGAIN.
• He's 'unanimous' about being against homos, all by himself.
• He appreciates the Sonichu Girls
• Shuffle! is a harem dating sim/anime he wants to see
• He was 'tested' for Autism...
• Has no desire to make new male friends
• He went to California to meet Cole
• Lesbians are okay, two gay lovers are not
• Threesome with two women a-okay with him
• "An incest?" he doesn't understand, discourages it
• Anne Boleyn is his aunt. He looked up Richard Weston and Mary Boleyn to find a link between them (on Wikipedia of course)
• He saw The Other Boleyn Girl. He knows no incest happened
• With the stress it's had to get 'spired'
• Sisterssss incest may be okay. Not for certain.
• Chris sees himself in Obama because they're both outcasts
• Humble opinion humble opinion humble opinion humble opinion
• In his American Gov Class he learned that he was a moderate
• Canadians are polite and play hockey.
• Troll explains December 21 2012 to him. Chris thinks it's the actual end of the world
• Discusses Chris's ED page being deleted
• Miyamoto saw the ED page
• Chris hates Clyde, that 'joike'
• Chris dad argues with Chris in the car, makes Chris depressed
• Chris tries to ignore his dad. He recently yelled at his dad and HIS DAD FLIPPED HIM OFF to which Chris said (insert condescending mothers voice) "Did you just give me the finger?!"
• Chris could take his dad on because he's FREAKIN' 81! ...or 80
• Chris may not love his dad but he has to respect him
• He ponders what life as a woman would be like
• Family guy quote: "God gave me the package I signed for it"
• CHRIS LIKES MEGAN MARIE GRIFFIN LOL RLY?
• Talks about steroids, effects. Steroid abusers should just pay for a sex change.
• Sooner have a sex change than turn into a homo
• Says some people are born gay or choose that way.
• For women it's a choice to be gay
• HE IS STRAIGHT AND WILL NOT BE CHANGED

Transcript

00:00-06:30: Chris talks about Transformers, anime, and the PS3.

Chris: ...both parts in a villain.

Troll: Do you plan to fix that any time soon, in the future?

Chris: Uh... yeah, I don't know. I did have an idea, though, about, uh, about psychic link, about psychic communication between her and Magi-Chan. But, uh, neither of them knowing about each other, physically, outside of that.

Troll: Alright.

Chris: Only the Decepticons. Get it? [Forced laughter] Like Transformers.

Troll: Ah, yes, you know there's a new movie. New number 2.

Chris: Yeah, I know. Yeah, they're doing number 2. I have both the DVD and Blu-ray version of the, uh, of the new movie. I also have a DVD of the original animated movie. And I have Generation One series copied onto DVD-R. The entire Generation One series.

[Pause]

Chris: Oh, great, four times the Bumblebee.

[Forced laughter]

Troll: I haven't even seen the first one yet, I don't even know if it's on Netflix.

Chris: Rent the DVD. RENT THE DVD. IT'S EASIER TO WAIT FOR IT TO FALL ONTO NETFLIX.

Troll: Yeah, we have that, we have the Ropoo box, but, uh, I know it used to be on the box, for instant lunch, but I don't know if it still is.

[Pause]

Troll: Oh, I love that movie!

[Pause]

Chris: Mmm. I downloaded a bunch of epi- bunch of shows on the, and movies from the PlayStation Network. I've rented some of the- I've rented some of the movies off of there, as well as a few episodes of Zammed. [Pause] Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait...

Troll: Eeh, hold on, hold on Gecko, I think he wants to read the website some more.

Chris: Uh, wait a minute, wait a minute, uh, did you say, did you say Zammed is on the Hex Bawx as well? [Pause] The anim- [Pause] Well, yeah it was one thing. I used to hate both the PlayStation and the Xbox, but then I ended up getting the PlayStation 1 at a rummage sale, then I just kinda like, gave it a test play, then I pretty much fell fo- then I decided not to trade it in, at that time. So, pretty much grew from that. But, like in the- [Pause] Yeah, but also, you know, it costs money to be on the Xbox Live. But anyway, yeah, I don't think so. Buyesanyway [starts typing loudly] Zammed, is that really on the, uh, Xbox Live? Its an anime bout this, uh, boy who, uh, pretty much- pretty much gets a- gets a- gets infected and becomes like this, uh, this animal-type character, muta- mutant like creature, something like that. Yeah, yeah, I'm interested in starting to, uh, download the, uh, a new anime they just- they put on there just recently. Shuffle. I think it's called Shuffle. Oh, scuse me for a second. [Clattering as Chris gets up.]

Troll: All right.

[Pause]

Troll: Uhn, I'm wondering if I should stay online, or go play Animal Crossing. [Drowned out by static and more clattering]

[Pause]

Chris: Uh, yeah, I tried uh, oh, I tried uh, downloading from torrents a bunch of times, but, um, most of the entire series of Samurai Pizza Cats, off a torrent, but, uh, still kind of lacked in quality. And, uh, they got their leh ic- they got their little icons recorded, uh, that they recorded from a TV station.

[Pause]

Troll: Yeah, we're picking up our 360 on Tuesday; we have one reserved, and then after that's a PS3, but I'm, uh-

[Pause]

Troll: Ha, Circuit City's closing it's doors, it's going downhill.

Chris: Anyway, uh, anyway, you know, recommended for if, you all get, for those who are getting a PlayStation 3, you know, go ahead and get, like, the least expensive one you can find, but preferably, one with, uh, that's capable of Wifi, that's the, uh, that's the 60GB or higher models. 20 if- Yeah- Well, yeah, w- well, I mean, uh, 20 or 40GB are not capable of the Wifi, you require an Ethernet cable. Yeah but I know but it's like available used, but anyway, anyway-anyway the point is, you can pick up the least expensive for a PlayStation 3, and give it more memory capacity. That's like more bang for your buck, by buying the- like a 500GB Serial AT- Internal Serial ATA Norton two and a half inch notebook drive. And then you just-and then you just swap out- swap it in- swap out the old one for the new one. That's what I did. I got like, I couldn't- I co-... It's been working for me! [Typing] Yeah well this- Yeah. Yeah I'm typing the details. It's a seri- [Pause, then more typing]

Chris: Yeah it's a serial... Yeah good for awhile but then you add- then you down- then you add like a bunch of- then you download like a bunch of movies or, er, I have from a torrent copied from PC to PlayStation 3 with a flash- with a flash drive or memory card or something like that. And then- and then and then-

[pause]

Chris: Hmm... eh, but anyway, ah it accepts up to 500GB for it's uh its internal hard Drive. And also, like you know, it can-it can hook up to uh one of its USB ports an external hard drive and store- and store all that stuff. Copy it from the PlayStation 3 Hard Drive to it. And you can access the movies on there. Except downloads from the PlayStation network, They can only be copied to like uh, the PlayStation Portable. The memory stick duo on that. I know, I uh [Pause] Yeah.

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah I mean turn on Ape escape or ralph or the longest time on the Japan version of the store. You know, Eye of Judgment.

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah I get it. Yeah I get it. Over like, over the PlayStation Network for the chat windows, yeah I get it. Yeah. [Pause]

Chris: But I'm just- I'm just trying to use that as an example.

[Pause, random noise, then another pause]

Chris: Hmmh. But I haven't been able to buy a torro or the Ape escape costumes yet Joey just to let you know. I mean I'm not getting my tugboat for a few more days.

[Pause]

Chris: Uh, I've heard of it I've never really seen it. Plus, I have like the original Gameboy game, Fist of North Star.

[Pause]

Chris: Uh no, I've pretty much only got escape- Ape Escape titles on the PSP during my PlayStation lifetime.

[Random background noise, then pause]

Chris: Hmm. Yeah that's why- that's why for those that were recreated from the UMD, I just- I think I'll just buy the UMD instead of wasting memory stick duo space. And uhh, Julie, I will definitely consider doing that for you, but I uh not at the moment.

[Pause]

Chris: Uh how'd you get NES games on your PSP? Because I understand with the latest upgrade tends to block out that capability.

[Pause]

Chris: Hmm.

[Random background noise, Pause]

Chris: I see.

[Pause]

Troll: Oh dude, February 10th, they're coming out with that Sega Greatest Hits Sonic collection thingy. 40 different games and all the original Sonic games. It's frickin' awesome. I think they're going platform Wide with that too.

Chris: That... I knew it's not It's not gamestab (?) only gonna be for like PS3 and Xbox 360.

Troll: Aw! I'd love to play that on the Wii!

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah, wouldn't we all.

[Pause]

Chris: I have Megaman 9 on my PlayStation 3. And plus I was able to download the online content.

[Pause]

Chris: Eh. Yeah I tried that- Yeah I have a converter cable yeah I tried that uhh. But uh, yeah it didn't work out for me so I ended up using- it just came up like black and white so I just ended up using the video input on the, uh TV port it still works for me. And uh, Megaman 9 is Ok, in my humble opinion, it's alright.

[Short pause]

Chris: Uhhh no. Not yet.

[Someone talks in the background, indistinct. Pause]

Chris: Right

[Pause. More Indistinct talking, Pause]

Chris: Oh. That's Interesting.

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah. Touhou? [radio or TV in background] I remember those things.

[Pause]

Troll: Ahh. I'm so out of the loop.

Chris: Uhhh. Yeah never really heard of that Uhhh. And I don't really play too many PC games, nowadays.

[Pause]

Chris: Ahh well, um. They say, can't stand the memory upgrade, that's for sure.

[Background noise, sounds like a TV. Pause]

Troll: [Forced Laughter]

Chris: Uh. Uh, yeah my mom just Uh, my family just bought- my mom- my family just bought the uh BMW, just uh basically I can't tell you much more beyond that.

Troll: Ahh.

[More odd background noise. Pause]

Chris: Yeah uh... Yeah I've heard of that, and I've decided that I'd rather not do that. I mean, PC is PC enough and PS3 is PS3 enough.

[Pause]

Chris: I have a PC input on my HDTV and it's like I could just set up and put my tower in there if I wanted to. But I've decided not to. My room is quite cluttered enough anyway.

[Brief pause] Chris: Yeah. Pretty much my Lego CWCville is taking up like an L quip- an L port- An L shaped portion of it.

Troll: When'd you get started on your Lego CWCville?

Chris: Lifetime. Start off with one brick and then you buy more bricks and basicaly-and there you go. Took a lifetime.

[Pause]

Chris: Yeahhh, but yeah but my family's like a bunch of Pack rats and uh, it's like you know, a bunch of their rooms is, like, cluttered. It's like- it's like they're, Quote from a Monty Python episode I downloaded. [Sudden ear-raping falsetto] Morning Missus Robinson! Morning Missus Robinson! You been out shopping? No! I've been shopping! What'd you buy? A piston Engine! What'd you buy that for?! IT WAS A BARGIN.

[Microphone problems of some sort?]

Chris: If. Buy stuff from uh, like uh goodwill and salvation army because [More Godawful Falsetto] IT WAS A BARGIN!

Troll: You do find the most interesting shirts, I'll tell you that.

Chris: Yeah, mostly they come from like, Goodwill or Salvation Army. Ahh, Yeah- I'll uh, definitely consider, uh uh if a demo- If a demo Resistant- Resident Evil 5 comes out and uh it has online capability I'll uh, might play it on that, Julie.

[Long pause]

Chris: Alright. Cuz you know, uh, like I've stated there was times. And I'm 100% unanimous in it. I'm against uh, homosexual males, period. Especially since I had the bad experiences in the... elementary school with the principle and all.

Troll: I'm so sorry.

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah. I appreciate the Sonichu Girls. Well-I mean, uh, I mean I take the- I mean, uh. Wait, I'll respect men, but uh that's, that's as far as I'll go...in the, in the level of liking men. I mean, just beyond respect [makes "Phew" sound] Nothing.

[Pause]

Chris: Hmm. [Some sort of hacking sound] Hmmm. Eeeahh, aright hang on, hang on, let me answer Cogsdev's question about lesbians. [Laughter]

Troll: Hmmmm, well now, how'd you get into lesbians?

Chris: It was just one of the- it was just one of the bunch of the- it was just one of the bunch of the videos on a DVD- on a DVD I got free from a... nerd- from a... from a female sex doll order on the AdamEve.com

Troll: Wow...

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah well, I'm saying that I hate homo males. And plus uh, I don't like, I don- I'm not- I'm not fond of men in general, cuz my father, he picks more arguments than flies in garbage dump. that's my personal joke about... Yeah I know but- yeah but still then there was the principle in the elementary school, again. And uh also I have tests from- from when I was being tested for Autism-

Troll: Mmm-Hmm?

Chris: That s- it said I'd get along- that I would get along better with fe- with uh, girls than I do with guys. So that's, so lot of, lot of aspects and points that uh lead up to my personal feelings- and I mean nothing personal against anybody, it's just that's the way I feel, would prefer not to uh, be too close to the men. I mean uh, I mean- uhehuhuh I mean like I said as far as I'll go is respect. Respect.

[Inaudible]

Yeah I uh- Yeah I uh Yeah I hear you, yeah I hear you on that but hmm. Yeah but uh yeah umm I guess as a friend it's Ok- I guess, eyaah, you know you can quote me on this uh, as a friend it- as a friend it's ok but you know uh I mean it's, but like it comes to like meet- uh, meeting new ones, uhh, I'd prefer Just kinda keep my distance. At time. I read these-I read these lines here. Hmm.

[Pause]

Chris: Aaaow. The question is Cheap

Troll: Where'd Sonichu go?

Chris: Oh, Oh, Oh. Yeah.

Troll: [Laugheter]

Chris: Yeah I thought of visiting another country, but you know it's uh expensive. I mean uh, I went- I mean uh I've on airplane one time. It was to fly all the way to California to visit my uh, half brother Joseph Cole Smithy who has a website ColeSmithy.com.

Troll: Mmm-Hmm.

[Typing]

Troll: [inaudible]

Chris: Yeah. Actually his whole name is Joseph Cole Smithy, but he also likes to go by Joe Cool, like Snoopy.

Troll: Ahhh.

Chris: Ahhhhhhh. Yeah between umm...

[Short pause]

Chris: Probably but uhhh... I mean, even though I'm... even though I- even though I feel, I mean I feel more, um... Well i guess but In the end I'd still, uhhh...

[Pause, momentary noise, then another pause]

Chris: I'd say I guess to that question. But you know I would be- I'm encouraging straight love between uh, straight couples. Men and women. I mean I encourage that more.

[Pause]

Chris: Uhh. Pretty much but it's like you know, between Lesbians, it's like, hmm partial courage. But then it's- but then again, but then between guys instead I would definitely 100% discourage. In my Humble opinion.

[Pause]

Chris: And all, huh. Yeah Ok. But Uh also I mean I'm uh, also, I've uh talked to others before with uh, Sarah, my uh s- s- Sarah my girlfriend. I can not be willing to do a threesome with uh two women, but defina- but definitely never with two guys.

Troll: Huh, that- that- Yeah I think I get that, you know I mean womens bodies is just a bit uh better, wouldn't you agree.

Chris: Uhh, I'm sorry what was the adjective you just used?

Troll: I said they look a bit better. Wo- womens, Womens' women's bodies look... Let me do this again. Women's bodies look a bit better.

Chris: Yes, Yes they are- yes they're they're more beautf- they're more beautiful. They're like, they're really- they're truly like works of art in their own way- just like yeah you know, just like you know the statues that uh, were in past times.

Troll: Hmm.

[Pause]

Chris: Uhhhh.

[Pause]

Chris: Ummm.

[Pause]

Chris: Uhh you know you sent me- you sent me a picture on playstation network Julie, and I'll take it into consideration but let me ask, uh... An incest?

Troll: Whatumean?

[Pause]

Chris: What?

Troll: incest... Yeah incests.

Chris: Eh, yeah sure. Send me a picture and I'll skype later, Julie. But yeah uh what's a- What is an incest? I mean I've heard that word, I've never really understood it.

Troll: She posted it right on the left.

[Pause]

Chris: Oh as in- Oh as in sex between bro... siblings. Oh.

Troll: Yeah. Right. Brother-Sister, Sister-sister.

Chris: Yeah... Um, yeah i would definately discourage that. Because you know, that a- that's another- that's another- that's another thing-that's another-that's another...bad- that's another bad way to go.

Troll: Huh.

Chris: Plus also- plus also, uh, you all know the story of Anne Boylen and I believe I mentioned- belive it- belive I mentioned before that it was spread around that my ancestor, was Ann- my ancestor, in an aunt sort of sense was Anne Boylen

Troll: Mmm Hmm?

Chris: So I'm a possible full decedent would be Mary Boylen.

Troll: Mmm.

Chris: But yeah it's like you know I'm trying to find the missing link between Mary, and the first earl of court named Richard Weston. I- I've looked it up on Wikipedia.

[Brief Pause]

Chris: But Uh, but yeah but anyway getting back to the uh Anne Boylen thing, I saw the movie "The Other Boylen Girl"

Troll: Mmm Hmm?

Chris: And then I- and then I- and then I saw the part where uh, you know it's like- you know Anne lost- lost a child in her uh, while she slept and then uh, yeah that just, that basically happened right there and there was like you know she tried to get pregnant form the uh, from her brother, George I belive his name was.

Troll: Mmm Hmm?

Chris: Yeah, like you know, it just didn't happen, i know- I know that for sure but like you know the first earl was like yeah... don't do that.

[Pause]

Chris: eh, it just depends on my inspiration but like you know, with the stress lately it's kind of hard to uh get inspired.

[Pause]

Chris: [Sigh] Yeah, but it's like you know- most of the process of removing myself from the comic and that's pretty much linking it to my real life there.

Troll Mmm Hmm?

Chris: So if that's the best link to your real life, it's kind of hard to, uh, keep it up to date there.

[Pause]

Chris: Yeah I'm removing myself at the end- at the end of the second eh, I'm taking myself out at the number two comic. Eh, yeah sure Julie, send me through skype.

[Pause]

Chris: Since you have the window open. Ahh. Alright so, to answer the question, sex between sisters, uh...

Troll: Mmm hmm? Uhh?

[Pause]

Chris: (inaudible)

[Pause]

Chris: Ummmmmm...

[Pause]

Troll: I mean it's not like they're gonna reproduce.

Chris: Yeah.

Troll: So... There's no messed up stuff there.

Chris: Yeaaah... Uhhh... I dunno. I guess between sisters... I guess that's Ok. I mean I'm not saying for certain.

Troll: Uhh Huh.

Chris: I'm not saying for certain. But like, you know, it's possibly OK. But I'm not saying for certain.

Troll: Hmm

[Pause]

Troll: It's uh, black, by the way.

Chris: I see

Troll: It's a pretty nice car.

[Pause]

Troll: Okay. Comeon.

[Pause. Broken for a moment when Chris Sighs, then continued silence.]

Troll: Hmm. You know.

[Pause]

Troll: I mean it runs about the same way, you know.

[Pause]

Troll: I'll

[Pause]

Troll: Ah, I dunno. But here's the thing. We'll get them. Ford's gonna come through. I mean we get the fiesta from Mexcio, 20-10. I mean you guys will finally get the European Ford focus, which is a way better looking car. I'd still invite him. Oh the ta-ta. The uh, ta-ta nano. That uses the Air Compressor.

[pause]

Troll: I have my limo though. My family has always had limos or alpines.

[Background noise, then pause]

Chris: Dun kadun kadun kadun.

Troll: So I'm curious, I hear a TV in the background, what are you watching by any chance?

Chis: no actually you're listening to- I turned down, I turned down my radio, listening to 95.1 Rock, with John Tesh on the nightly run.

Troll: Oh, yeah.

[Pause]

Troll: I myself am in uh Louisville Kentucky.

Other Troll: Me too.

Chris: I once- I once knew- I once knew an uncle Screwy-Louie who lived in Louisville.

Troll: Oh

Chris: That's a little pun-joke I made up.

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