Jail Letter - 30 November 2021 (Celestia)

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On 3 December 2021, Chris sent a letter from jail to an Onion Farms user named Celestia. In this letter, Chris discusses with her the concept of "self-religion", which she claims to practice. Following from this, Chris talks about his plans to take what he claims to have learned from the Bible, and implement them into his own convoluted belief system. Chris apparently empathizes with Celestia's "self-religion", and applauds her for following her own path.

Some other highlights of this letter include:

  • Chris mentions how he copes in jail by talking to his Imaginary friends.
  • Chris recommends the Warhol book as a read, even though in his Tweets it can be deduced that Chris cherry-picks and ignores parts of the book he likes and dislikes.
  • Chris encourages “extensive letters” probably because his clawing need for attention isn’t quenched by the current amount of letters.
  • Chris again confirms that the jail documents all communication of inmates and the outside world.
  • Chris’s cursive handwriting is notably worse than his regular.
  • Chris thinks that his handwriting is impossible to replicate, even when trolls have already proven their uncanny ability to replicate Chris’s work with the troll-made Sonichu 11.

Chris's Response

(A drawing of Chris in Sonichu form saying "I foresaw your letter long ago." is seen on the upper right corner of the page)

Hi,<CENSORED>[note 1]

Thank you for the letter. I actually have forseen receiving your letter in a vision and a dream long ago. My having read it is further confirmation of the coming events. Know that you are actually among the Good of this Earth, and upon my Second Coming, you shall be shifted with the collective to the O.C. and F.C. - occupying Universe's Earth in Universe 1C-211987.

I appreciate your self-religion concept and choice, for you have chosen to live Spiritually for yourself; I encourage and applaud that. Shortly, I shall be personally upgrading for Christianity to be more Spiritual and Neutral-Religion. The Truth is ANY, many, All, One, or No Religion is the Correct Religion, whichever is best in feeling for any respective individual, and to start, as a base, with a Bible is a good option, then they are encouraged to go outside the Bible for themselves and live in good of spirituality as possible for themselves. So, yes, you are on your own right spiritual track for yourself,<CENSORED>.

I have been adapting well, and received a lot of kind support, and Blessings from my fellow Gods and Goddesses I am never alone for I have Magi-Chan Sonichu, Cryzel Rosechu, Sylvana Rosechu, and the one-and-only Mewtwo, along with everyone else, including Sonichu, Rosey Rosechu, and all, our ally and friend High-Level and Ranking Pokémon, as well as an infinite number of ally Spirits, Souls, Entities, and Angels, and our Soldiers of Heaven's Armies. I count my blessings a Lot, and I work hard and diligently in and out of my Body in Astral Manifestation.

But, that’s a long story and bunch of facts, Ultimate, I’ve shared online in handwriting. My Aura, vibrations, and Handwriting is Impossible to replicate.

I like all kind of music, except vocal-harsh Heavy Metal. I recommend the book “Warhol/Chris Chan” by Don Lashomb; he actually got me More than half-right in it, and it makes for a Great self-reflecting and self-help book for ANYONE. Spinach & Mushroom pizza is good, as well as Mac & Cheese and Mint-chocolate Chip Ice Cream. “I’m At Soup” and “Two Number 9’s” are a couple of fun memes.

Let me know your eye and hair colour when you send the photos, please, as the guards photocopy, then shred the original. I encourage extensive letters, but know with the jail’s rules, three sheets of paper (six pages front/back) is the incoming limit.

Enjoy a custom bottle label, enclosed, to laminate then affix onto any bottle for your further enlightenment.

Go forth with Peace and Clarity by my Power, Glory, and Blessings as Lord, God and Avatar.

Be safe & well, Ms. Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, the Goddess Blue Heart, Avatar, and, lord, messiah, Savior, and God of all.

Original Letter

Notes

  1. The sender's identity has been redacted in the available photos of this letter.
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