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<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em; color:#000;">Welcome to the [[CWCki]]!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris-Chan]],<br>author of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', controversial [[YouTube]] personality,<br>[[transgender]] [[Messiah complex|goddess]], and [[:File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 25 August 2023.png|formerly]] [[Jail Saga|incarcerated]] [[Affair with Mother|motherfucker]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">'''''[[Passive observers|OBSERVE]] CHRISTORY. DON'T [[Unholy Quintet|MAKE]] CHRISTORY.'''''</div>
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Skeet is the god of eternity at the McSpanky's fast food restaurant. Skeet calls everyone, "dude," and claims to be smart, but others see him as dim-witted. However, McSpanky's came to life and tried to destroy every other food joint and Skeet did not run away. When the restaurant was shot at the sun, the Space Bandits found the place and turned it into a spaceship. Believing that Skeet was the one responsible for this awesome technology, they vowed to find him and exploit his great wisdom, which they never did, for some reason.
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Skeet, initially called upon as Skeetui Yoshimato, was raised in an exceedingly poor rice village in southern Koyushu. His grandfather was a war trained assassin who was tasked to eliminate U.S operatives. Although Skeetu's grandfather was Japanese, he was fluent in American English. This is why "Skeet" sounds like a typical American teenage boy. After many years of vigorous katana training on Mt. Fuji, Skeet traveled to the United States of America in hopes of beginniing a new life, honoring his ancestors in the process. Skeetui wanted to experience the American Dream, and thought working in fast food would be a good place to start. So, after moving to Retroville, Skeetui earned a job position as the cashier at McSpanky's. Soon, through hard work and dedication, he became employee of the month. This was an achievement unparalleled by any employee of McSpanky's. When Jimbo and two of his friends walked in and talked about getting a job at the restaurant, Skeetui made a seemingly irrational move by hiring the boys. However, Skeetui was a man who wanted to give these younger children an opportunity to straighten themselves out. Initially, two of his new employees worked well considering their age. However, Jimbo gave Skeetui trouble in a now-notorious incident in which Jimbo claimed to be smarter than the cash register, therefore stating he didn't need to use it. But, the cash register is used for tracking purposes, validating Skeetui's discontent with Jimbo. Later that night, Jimbo would sneak into McSpanky's and would commit vandalism by changing the interior to appear futuristic. As if this weren't the worst case, Jimbo also attached rockets to the restaurant, launching it into the air. As the restaurant was taking off, Skeetui was bravely saving the lives of men, women, and children alike by line backing them off the premise. However, time was very limited, causing the demise of our hero who, soon after, ascended into godhood. 
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  === Trivia ===
__NOTOC____NOEDITSECTION__


Skeetui was originally more powerful in the manga. However, he was nerfed to dish out less damage per second in the anime, as for Jimbo fans would complain. 
[[Category:Special]]
Some look up to Skeetui as the Profit, and is thought to be the messiah that will return one day.
Skeetui roughly translates to "sperm whale", according to fan translations.
It can be observed that Skeetui's main catchphrase is "dude".

Latest revision as of 23:03, 27 October 2024

Welcome to the CWCki!
The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow Chris-Chan,
author of Sonichu, controversial YouTube personality,
transgender goddess, and formerly incarcerated motherfucker.
OBSERVE CHRISTORY. DON'T MAKE CHRISTORY.
We currently have 2,647 articles... and counting!
"Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,
that may seem similar to anyone in real life,
are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic."
We highly advise against trying to contact or otherwise
seek out Chris, or anyone who currently is or has
previously been associated with him, in any way.
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v • d • e  
New to the CWCki? Here's how you can get started.
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Major articles
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Check this out!
Chris meets GodBear • Watch & Win Sweepstakes • AN F IN ENGLISH CLASS?! • Slam attack! • Attraction Sign • "I'M STILL STUCK AS A VIRGIN WITH RAGE!" • Kick, Punch, it's all in the mind! • CWC is Angry • Masturbating and squirtin' • ShecameforCWC.JPG • Dykes...Dykes! CHINA! • Medallion Destruction • The Pickle Man tricked me again... • Boobies! Vaginas. Mmm... • I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD! • DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS • I'm cuttin it down! • JULAAAY! • Ohio trip • Medallion up the ass • Date with Emily • I'll be in your dreams! • Holding Out For a Hero • GONNA STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH! • MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEARRRRR! • I have your mugshot... • Pyong, pyong, pyong! • Bottoms up! • I get BLANGRY! • Grand number of pounds • Crazy nudie audition • I love you so much, I love you so muuuuuch! • I got a fish! • Rollin' and Trollin' • BURN IN HELL! • OK2BGay • Chris humps his PS3 • SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE • SingStar Challenge • MY! NAME! IS! NOT! IAN! BRANDON! SOMETHING! • DIEEEEEEE YOU! • I've got a little Chun-Li within me. • OFF! THE! INTERNET! • Sign Destruction Video • Half-and-half! • Chris Loses It • Chris Did 9/11 • Father Call • BUDDHA BELLY AND EXAGGERATED MANBOOBS! • Patti will have your soul tonight! • Alec Benson Leary calls • CURSE-YE-HA-ME-HA! • Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots! • Trolling stupid pickle suited... • JEW! • Fridays After Five • JenkinsJinkies • Chris writes underage gay erotica • Chris destroys his PS3 • Mr Popo Cosplay • DivineTrial • Electric Hedgehog power! • Chris Chan's a real nigga! • Tomgirl pictures • Cakefarts • Goodbye Horses • Chris Rocks Out • Chris and his mom do a hit-and-run • Burning down the house • Sonic's arms are NOT blue! • Don't call anybody! • HelloLadyFans • Proposition to Sega • Frozen Semen • Please have my babies. • Stephanie Bustcakes • Die, Trump, die! • DIY Vagina • Do not hate! Hate is not so good. • #HarassCWCdirectly • Chris dances with Magi-Chan • Q&A NO MORE! • Get Out, You D*** Nazis • Dick Licker; that is I • Hey now, you're an All-Star! • TooManyGames meltdown • AY, YOU TOILET! • Chris kisses Cryzel • Chris screams at the camera • Just keep reading... • The Last Will and Testament of Chris-Chan • THIS IS WHAT CHRIS ACTUALLY BELIEVES. • HASBROOOOOOO! • The Point of No Return • The Perp Walk of Shame • I am Literally also Jesus Christ • It was all my Mom's Idea • Pinned Down at the Nuthouse • AND I BRING, PERSONALLY, THE SECOND COMING. • Team Rocket's stupid! • You shipped me with that Snorlax!

Meta: Love Quest • Transgender • Business • Financhu Crisis • Roleplay • Dimensional Merge

Pre-Christory: Early Childhood • Nathaniel Greene • Leonard Bearstein • High School

Early Adult Chronicles: PVCC • Megan • Stackhouse

Classic Chris: ED • Blanca • GAMePLACe • Jimmy Hill • Clyde Cash • PandaHalo • Miyamoto • Julie • PSN Hacking • Emily • Ivy • Vanessa • CWCipedia • Liquid • Asperchu • Tito

Dark Ages: First Exile • Jackie • Calling Out • Second Exile

Renaissance: Catherine • Sonic Boom • Lady Managers • Pmurt • Doopie • Quinn

Transcendental Awakening: Idea Guy • Prequel Comic • Guard Dog • TTS • GOPony • Jacob

Rise-N-Fall: Copitz • TF2 Analysis • Secret Shipfic • Watchmen • Praetor • Warhol • Incest

Silent Years: Jail • Third Exile

Second Coming: Revelations

Body: Drugs • Fashion • Gender • Health • Nutrition • Sex

Psyche: Coping • Manipulation • Mental healthcare • Nostalgia • Reality

Personality: Anger • Ego • Hypocrisy • Kindness • Negligence • Personality • Remorse • Stress

Expression: Art • Censorship • English • Language • Music • Oratory • Spanish • Writing

Society: Contests • Death • The Law • Politics • Pornography • Race • Reading • Religion • Sexuality • Socialization • Sports

Business: Brand loyalty • Business • Copyright • Money • Negotiation • Work

Technology: Cameras • Electronics • The Internet • Science • Television • Video Games
2003 • 2004 • 2005 • 2006 • 2007 • 2008 • 2009 • 2010 • 2011 • 2012 • 2013 • 2014 • 2015 • 2016 • 2017 • 2018 • 2019 • 2020 • 2021 • 2022 • 2023 • 2024

Quote of the Now

“ I am Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime. This is my website with occasional updates from me on that which is good. And featured are items available from me on the store, a blog, a section for fan arts, and more to come down the road. ”
Chris, introducing himself on the homepage of Cwclight.

Article of the Week

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Jacklyn's Naughty No Trick, All Treat, 31 Days of Halloween Contest was a contest Jackie made for Chris, where he would have to make a new cosplay video for every day of October 2010, and/or share at least one fact about himself and/or his life. Chris would initially refuse to do it, which made her cry, but he would become completely on board after a few rule clarifications. Jackie also clarified that if he succeeded, she would have sex with him. This contest resulted in a huge amount of videos uploaded that month, a quantity has yet to be topped by Chris ever since. It also, barring one more video uploaded the next month, serves as the last hurrah of the 'classic Chris' era, prior to him coming out as a tomgirl. Jackie came up with the idea immediately after Chris posted Song for Jackie.MOV, possibly seeing the gold mine of content that could come from Chris cosplaying.

Most of Chris's cosplays are completely bizarre depictions of the characters, that no-one would be able to recognize if not told who it was by Chris. Also, while the intent was for Chris to upload a video every day of the month, Chris would often be late and upload videos days later, citing his computer and Internet issues as the result - though other times, he would claim he would upload videos using the Internet at the Alderman Library, but then forget to do so for weeks. Chris also half-assed a lot of the videos made for the contest due to laziness, or having discomfort or unwillingness to do the task he was given (such as rewriting the ending to Sonichu 10 to show forgiveness towards Alec Benson Leary and his crew, or simply cleaning his dirty shower); this was despite the potential reward for properly following the rules being him finally no longer being a virgin with rage. Ultimately, the contest ended with Jackie being too frustrated at Chris to give him some china.

(More...)

This Day in Christory

ALIENS!

Today in Christory, in 2008, mysterious signs appeared on the Chandlers' lawn.

(more...)

Did You Know...

Improvement Projects of the Now

GO WORK ON IT!

The article in desperate need of improvement at the moment is the Golden Church of Sonichu.

The following long-term projects to improve the wiki are also needed:

  • A backlog of chats that extends back several years, to finish adding to chat pages or mention in articles. Some chats are still archived on Kiwi Farms only and need to be saved elsewhere.

Shirt of the Week

The Sonic Rainboom!

From the Business saga:

Appeared in Jungle bells.

Da Update

CWCki News.png
It is currently October 2024. It has been...
33
 day(s) since Chris was last spotted in public.
We highly advise against seeking out Chris, or anyone who is or has previously been associated with him, in any way.
Current Updates
Recently Uncovered Info

CWCki News

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Official CWCki Server Discord • CWCki Club forum • r/ChrisChanSonichu

Check out the Official CWCki Server Discord, and the section about Chris at the CWCki Club forums, and the Chris Chan subreddit, full of lively and often times thoughtful discussions on Chris and Sonichu. (Use the wiki talk pages or the CWCki-related channels in the Discord for article-related discussions).

Picture of the Now

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Video of the Now

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