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Welcome to the CWCki! The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow Chris Chan, the author of Sonichu and (alleged) literal motherfucker. We currently have 2,910 articles...and counting! "Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic."

Article of the Week Obesity is perceived to be a worldwide epidemic, especially in the United States of America, with about 73.6% of adults overweight and 42.5% obese. Among that 42.5% is Chris. Chris seems to be in denial about his own obesity. His denial is evidenced by the fact that he portrays himself as a slim, barrel-chested hero in his comics and in Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE, when he describes himself as "fit as a fiddle". Furthermore, in his numerous dating profiles discovered by the trolls, he often lists himself as having an "athletic build" or at the very least having weight that is proportionate to his height. Another example of this was when he created a character for his comics named Sammy, whom Chris stated is based off him when he "temporary [sic] gained weight, became stupid, and went to watch television at ghost command", even though he has always been this way. Except, y'know, for the Ghost Command part. But that's a whole other problem. Further cementing his obesity, on 2 October 2011, Chris's voluptuous manboobs won an award on manboobs.co.uk. (More...) Incarceration Counter It has been... 1,721 days since Chris was last placed in custody. 942 days since the last known communication from Chris. We highly advise against contacting Chris in any way. Jesus Counter It has been 1,353 days since Chris last claimed to be Jesus Christ. Jailhouse Begging Counter Do not send money to Chris: satisfying a degenerate inmate's sweet tooth is a waste of your hard earned C-Quarters. It has been… 1,360 days since Chris last begged for money to waste on food from his jail’s commissary. This Day in Christory Today in Christory, in 2009, The Christian and the Hedgehog Boys COMEBACK is informally released. (more...) Today was also the day, in 2017, when The Classic was rediscovered, albeit moldy and water-damaged and put up for sale. (more...) Did You Know... ... that Chris has performed oral sex on Magi-Chan? ... that BlueSpike was the ween in the JULAAAAAAAY call? ... that JenkinsJinkies is definitely NOT Chris? ... that Chris was no longer stuck as a virgin with rage after hiring a prostitute? ... that Chris will never get to return the favor by dancing with Tiffany Gowen at their high school reunion? ... that Chris has committed assault and battery against Michael Snyder and illegally pepper sprayed the Yellow-Shirted Foe? ... that Chris got fired from Wendy's for scaring a small child with his Donald Duck impersonation? ... that Chris attempted to fix The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail, and somehow made it make less sense? ... that Chris BILLY MAYS Allison Amber Brendan Fraser Mary Lee Walsh Robbie Van Drawson is the Mayor of CWCville? ... that the Idea Guys brainwashed Chris into believing that his imaginary daughter Crystal would be brought into the world by Chris anally raping Sonichu? ... and that Chris has once fisted Sonichu as a punishment? ... that Chris is cool with adoption, but his dream of his future daughter calls for blood, tears and semenal descent?

Quote of the Now “ Also, a special Thank You shout-out to the two fans who have gifted to me the Golden Beetle and Wingman and the @NintendoAmerica Switch 2 shown in this video. I will not dox them. ⚡️💙⚡️ ” Chris on X and Bluesky. Da Update It is currently April 2026. It has been... 28 day(s) since Chris was last spotted in public. 21 day(s) since Chris has last livestreamed. Record Streak: 233 days 31 day(s) since Chris last tried to "redeem" himself. We highly advise against seeking out Chris, or anyone who is or has previously been associated with him, in any way. Current Updates 17 April Chris accidentally publishes Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1987 Wave 1, then quickly sets the video to private. Chris publishes Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Golden Beetle and Wing Man. Chris publishes Transformers of Cwcville Short - It's Play Time and its subtitled version. 11 April - Chris uploads CLog 04112026 - Responses to Courtney's Recent Thoughts. 4 April - Chris posts CLog 04042026 - We Three Are Here Together With All of You. 3 April - Chris publishes Reading Chaos Crystal Control Act Plus, Part 4, Liquidchu's Arrogance. 1 April - Chris posts a "confession" video. 29 March - Chris publishes CLog - 03222026 - Announcement from Scarlet LaRose. 28 March - Chris livestreams Mewgenics Let's Play 1 with Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime. Only significant events are listed. For all current updates, read Chris's recent social media posts or browse the most recent changes to the CWCki. Recently Uncovered Info 14 April - Two prank calls that were shared in October 2011 are added to the CWCki. 21 March - Chris's Reddit account u/Aggravating-Top-877 is discovered. CWCki News Account Creation NOTE: You must be 18 years or older to get an account. Account creation for the CWCki is open. To request an account, contact a CWCki Jerkop. They can be reached at - the Official CWCki Server Discord - message: Hurtful Truth Level, or Larry the Larryhog Official CWCki Server Discord • Kiwi Farms forum • CWCki Club forum • r/ChrisChanSonichu Check out the Official CWCki Server Discord, and the sections about Chris at the Kiwi Farms, the CWCki Club forums, and the Chris Chan subreddit, full of lively and often times thoughtful discussions on Chris and Sonichu. (Use the wiki talk pages or the CWCki-related channels in the Discord for article-related discussions).

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