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BILLY MAYS

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NO VICTORY, NO DEFEAT. THE SURVIVOR WILL CARRY ON THE FIGHT. IT IS OUR DESTINY.
 

 

—BILLY MAYS's final statement to the CWCki

Billy Mays
SirWilliamMaysOBE.jpg
Information
Name William Darrell Mays
Date of Birth 20 July 1958
Date of Death 28 June 2009 (aged 50)
Gender Male
Nationality American
Race White
Occupations Pitchman
Mayor of CWCville

BILLY MAYS (20 July 1958 – 28 June 2009) was a TV advertising man turned Internet troll, and a true patriot, as well as the true and honest Mayor of CWCVille from 3 March 2009 until his untimely and highly suspicious death. Provided both epic lulz and wisdom in #Sonichu and on PVCC during his noble lifetime. He was famous for his signature ALL CAPS style.

History

Chris desecrated the memory of BILLY MAYS by portraying him with Sonichu on his shirt. Note how many fingers he has.

Mayoralty

His first order of business was "ADULT PARTYING", and promised that everyone will go home smokey. He stated that "THE ROADS WILL POUR CHEAP BEER AND CARTONS OF CIGARETTES", noting that the poor citizens of CWCville deserve a week of "DRUNKEN STUPOR". During his short reign as mayor, BILLY MAYS instituted several groundbreaking reforms and was loved by all, with a record-breaking 99% approval rating.[citation needed] Sadly, CWCville's era of prosperity was quick to end after only a few months.

Murder

On 28 June 2009, BILLY MAYS was found dead in his mansion in Tampa, where he resided after suffering several assassination attempts by various hitmen, allegedly under the employ of Christian Weston Chandler. The true cause of his death is unknown, but his death was suspiciously close to Clyde Cash's apparent death on 22 May 2009.

In Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009, Chris claims he didn't kill BILLY, but rather that BILLY was a victim of a fatal heart attack. In Rollin' and Trollin' (17 July 2009) Chris talked about the construction of the BILLY MAYS Tower in CWCville as a memorial to his dead bodyguard.

In Sonichu

In Sonichu #9, BILLY MAYS fails to free Ivy[1] when she is strangled by elevator wires. The slickness of the walls keeps him from climbing up them to save her. However, the walls of text and general bad writing led to some confusion and the belief that he also died in the comic.

In Chris's Biography Page on the CWCipedia, he lists BILLY MAYS as a "non-cannon" character, despite his appearance in central episodes of Chris's comics.

Post death

BILLY's message from beyond

In his Rollin' and Trollin' video, Chris laments the death of his "bodyguard" BILLY MAYS, and announces the near-completion of the BILLY MAYS Tower. That a skyscraper could have been constructed so quickly after BILLY MAYS's death is suspicious, and many CWCville residents believe Chris arranged the building of the Tower as a way to launder money stolen from his parents' credit cards, and that the naming of the Tower is nothing more than a publicity stunt to leech off of BILLY MAYS's popularity.

See also

References

  1. [1]
Christian Weston Chandler's people

Chris himself: Chloe | Bill Riley | Junior Jenkins | Carlos Chantor | Stephanie Bustcakes | Night Star


Family:

At home: Bob Chandler | Barbara Chandler | Patti Chandler | The Chandler Cats | Clover and Snoopy

Others: Cole Smithey | Aunt Corrina | Minor Family Members | Daniel Weston | Anne Boleyn

Future: Lovely Weather | Crystal Weston Chandler | Reginald Chandler


Friends:

Sweethearts: Blanca Weiss | PandaHalo | Julie | Ivy | Kacey | Jackie | Catherine

Minor sweethearts: Lori Lopez | Hanna | Sarah Jackson | Emily | Vanessa Hudgens | Faeryn | Jessica Quinn

Sweethearts-to-be: Megan Schroeder | The Wallflower | DoopieDoOver

Gal-pals: Sarah Nicole Hammer | Laura Dorazio | Kellie Andes | Tiffany Gowen | Anna McLerran | Kim Wilson | Clare Porter

White knights: Robert Simmons V | Kenneth Erwin Englehardt | William Elliott Waterman

Others: Female fanbase | MLP voice actresses | Pokémon club friends | Rocky Shoemaker | Sam and Ellen | Virginia Jeanine Sanford


Trolls:

The Miscreants: Arjen Van Dierten | Bryan Bash | Clyde Cash | Jack Thaddeus | Jason Kendrick Howell | Joshua Martinez | Liquid Chris | Lordsillynipples | Man in the Pickle Suit | Sarah May | Surfshack Tito | Vivian Gee

The Asperpedia Four: Alec Benson Leary | Evan Christopher George | Mao Ling | Sean August Watley

Famous people: BILLY MAYS | Jay Z | Jimmy Hill | Reggie Fils-Aimé | Shigeru Miyamoto | Takashi Tezuka

Others: Arthur Spatchcock | Jeff/Francine | Johan | LadyOfTheCosmo | Thorg


Other enemies:

PVCC: Kene Meniru | Mary Lee Walsh

Jerkops: Bagget | Jerkhief

Manajerks: B-Manajerk | Kirby | "Lady" Manajerk | Michael Snyder | ScotPalazzo | Turdijerk | W-M-Manajerk | Yellow-Shirted Foe

The GAMe PLACe: Daniel Mimms | Lucas

Jerks: Joseph Herring | Wes Iseli

Others: Abusive babysitter | Adam Stackhouse | Bruce Johnson | Kathleen | Lulu.com executives | Omar Woodley | Pmurt | Rob Bell


Miscellaneous:

Actual people: A-Log | Barack Obama | Caitlin | DStecks | George W. Bush | Mia Hamm | Michael Hirtes | Ryan Cash

Inanimate objects: Kimmi | Naru | Officer Nasty


CWCipedia logo.png
For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on BILLY MAYS