Main Page

Welcome to the CWCki! The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow Chris Chan, the author of Sonichu and (alleged) literal motherfucker. We currently have 2,668 articles...and counting! "Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic."

Article of the Week In October 2016, Chris visited some of the stores at which he is banned and asked the management to sign a contract to unban him. The documents were leaked to Kiwi Farms on 13 October. Chris's attitude to bans appears to have remained the same as his reaction to his ban from the GAMe PLACe nearly a decade earlier, using ridiculous negotiation tactics to tackle bans that he just cannot get over. These documents are also a big example of his egotistical nature and deteriorating sense of reality post-Tomgirl, believing that businesses (that'll be better without his patronage) will sign a legal document that will unban him and prevent them from being able to call the police against him (which is illegal since contracts cannot be used to protect from criminal prosecution, thus making it null and void), all because a violent, egotistical lolcow believes that not signing would prove that they are "most uncompassionate and lacking of heart and soul of any person", and are a bunch of "unwelcoming immature rat -a**" b*****", comparing them to Donald Trump. He also believes that the reasons that he was banned are now "outdated" (similar to how he tried to convince Michael Snyder that he needs to "forgive and forget"), and that the "Human Rights Campaign" would be on his side since he's now a ""L"esbian "T"ranswoman", the L and T from LGBTQ. (More...) Incarceration Counter It has been... 1,208 days since Chris was last placed in custody. 429 days since the last known communication from Chris. We highly advise against contacting Chris in any way. Jesus Counter It has been 840 days since Chris last claimed to be Jesus Christ. Jailhouse Begging Counter Do not send money to Chris: satisfying a degenerate inmate's sweet tooth is a waste of your hard earned C-Quarters. It has been… 847 days since Chris last begged for money to waste on food from his jail’s commissary. This Day in Christory Today in Christory, in 2009, Christian answered some of the letters in Mailbag 2. (more...) Did You Know... ... that Chris has performed oral sex on Magi-Chan? ... that BlueSpike was the ween in the JULAAAAAAAY call? ... that JenkinsJinkies is definitely NOT Chris? ... that Chris was no longer stuck as a virgin with rage after hiring a prostitute? ... that Chris will never get to return the favor by dancing with Tiffany Gowen at their high school reunion? ... that Chris has committed assault and battery against Michael Snyder and illegally pepper sprayed the Yellow-Shirted Foe? ... that Chris got fired from Wendy's for scaring a small child with his Donald Duck impersonation? ... that Chris attempted to fix The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail, and somehow made it make less sense? ... that Chris BILLY MAYS Allison Amber Brendan Fraser Mary Lee Walsh is the Mayor of CWCville? ... that the Idea Guys brainwashed Chris into believing that his imaginary daughter Crystal would be brought into the world by Chris anally raping Sonichu? ... and that Chris has once fisted Sonichu as a punishment? ... that Chris is cool with adoption, but his dream of his future daughter calls for blood, tears and semenal descent?

Quote of the Now “ You just elected Sentinel Fucked Up Prime into office after knowing what he did last term. 🤬 ” Chris on Twitter, comparing Donald Trump to a character from Transformers Da Update It is currently November 2024. It has been... 20 day(s) since Chris was last spotted in public. We highly advise against seeking out Chris, or anyone who is or has previously been associated with him, in any way. Current Updates 16 November - Chris posts Ultra Sonichu to Cwclight. 11 November Chris announces a Rosechu medallion for sale. Chris posts Blake Sonichu and A few previously unanswered questions to Cwclight. 9 November - After a few days of posting on social media site Bluesky, Chris announces on Twitter that he will make a move to Bluesky and that he has blocked Twitter's owner Elon Musk. 6 November - OfficialCWCmart is updated with multiple artworks: the fifth part to Act 4 of Chaos Crystal Control, "Portal Workings" from the 2021 Lost Commissions, and "I Had Returned Home" from OfficialCWCmart Jail Art. 5 November - Chris casts his vote in the 2024 election, then records a livestream reacting to the results. 4 November Chris implies that his Kamala Harris signs had either been defaced or stolen. Chris announces a livestream for 5 November on the election results. Recently Uncovered Info 11 November - Role-play coping from August 2020 4 October - Night Star, personality tests from October 2019 CWCki News Account Creation NOTE: You must be 18 years or older to get an account. Account creation for the CWCki is open. To request an account, contact a CWCki Jerkop. They can be reached at - the Official CWCki Server Discord - message: Hurtful Truth Level, or Larry the Larryhog Official CWCki Server Discord • CWCki Club forum • r/ChrisChanSonichu Check out the Official CWCki Server Discord, and the section about Chris at the CWCki Club forums, and the Chris Chan subreddit, full of lively and often times thoughtful discussions on Chris and Sonichu. (Use the wiki talk pages or the CWCki-related channels in the Discord for article-related discussions).

Picture of the Now

Video of the Now Click to load content