Difference between revisions of "Main Page"

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(Removed shirt of the now because no one was updating it.)
 
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Who gives a shit who's page it is?  You are ruining Kellie's life so I am here to ruin this site. Pictures of her kids are unacceptable. So you can block me a million times. I can create a million email address and keep coming back. You want to be dicks I can show all you racists fucks what a dick is. And since I happen to be black it will be a larger dick than you racists wack jobs have.
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<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em; color:#000;">Welcome to the [[CWCki]]!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris-Chan]],<br>author of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', controversial [[YouTube]] personality,<br>[[transgender]] [[Messiah complex|goddess]], and [[:File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 25 August 2023.png|formerly]] [[Jail Saga|incarcerated]] [[Affair with Mother|motherfucker]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">'''''[[Passive observers|OBSERVE]] CHRISTORY. DON'T [[Unholy Quintet|MAKE]] CHRISTORY.'''''</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">We currently have [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles... and counting!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">''"Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,<br> that may seem similar to anyone in real life, <br>are purely coincidental, or otherwise [[parody|parodic]]."<br>'''''We highly advise ''against'' trying to contact or otherwise<br> seek out Chris, or anyone who currently is or has<br> previously been associated with him, in ''any'' way.'''''</div>
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Do not make me get some hackers involved bitches.  I;'' have it so you can even find your site anymore.


Suck a dick fags. Then kill yourselves.
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[[Category:Special]]

Latest revision as of 10:31, 28 August 2025

Welcome to the CWCki!
The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow Chris-Chan,
author of Sonichu, controversial YouTube personality,
transgender goddess, and formerly incarcerated motherfucker.
OBSERVE CHRISTORY. DON'T MAKE CHRISTORY.
We currently have 2,889 articles... and counting!
"Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,
that may seem similar to anyone in real life,
are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic."
We highly advise against trying to contact or otherwise
seek out Chris, or anyone who currently is or has
previously been associated with him, in any way.
CWCki Banner Introduction.jpg


Quote of the Now

One more complaint! One, more, itsy-bitsy complaint! L-Ight! L-IGHT! LIGHT POWER! LIGHT POWER! LIGHT! LIGHT! Okay, how could anybody confuse light for white?! And then turn it into something obviously F-[Fluttershy yay] racist?! [shakes head side to side] I never said white power. I never said white power. I said LIGHT power. [stands up and moves closer to the camera] Here's your lesson, here is your f-[Fluttershy yay] bonus lesson! Ligh, wigh, ligh, whi, ligh, whi. [clears thoat] [sits back down] OKAY?! I am not a racist. I said and I exuded with an aura sphere! Mind you, you could consider it ka-me-ha-me-ha of exuding light power! Alright!?
Chris in Reading Chaos Crystal Control Act Epilogue

Article of the Week

CWC kicked out of Too Many Games.jpg

TooManyGames is an annual three-day gaming convention currently held at the Greater Philadelphia Expo Center in Oaks, PA. Chris attended the convention on 22 and 23 June 2018. He wore The Classic for Day 2. He had also brought along his baseball bat.

He had started a GoFundMe page to help cover costs, as he had narrowly avoided foreclosure on his home one month before. Three people donated $120.

Chris acted very inappropriate towards many of the guests there by kissing and/or touching them, especially those who took pictures and video with him (including a guest who was 16 years old). This eventually culminated in him being thrown out. He reacted by having a meltdown in the venue, curling up on the floor in the fetal position. Security was brought in to escort Chris out. jab50yen helped comfort Chris alongside the mother of an autistic child who was attending the event.

(More...)

Coping Counter

Chris has many maladaptive coping mechanisms based in fantasies and magical thinking that he resorts to when reality doesn't go his way.

It has been…

11
days since Chris made up a new escapist fantasy to cope with reality.
1,630
days since Chris claimed to be Jesus Christ to cope with his incarceration.
2,622
days since the Dimensional Merge was to be completed, a coping mechanism Chris believes will rescue him from his debt and other life problems.
3,055
days since Chris joined the cult of the Idea Guys, which further fueled his escapist fantasies.


This Day in Christory

The Wallflower

Today in Christory, in 2010, Chris e-mailed the Wallflower, mostly to talk about his malfunctioning VCR. Although Chris claimed to have learned "a bunch of my techno know-how" from his father, he reported in a second e-mail that day that he couldn't fix it. Chris then stated his intention to donate it to Goodwill, where their "tech people" would supposedly repair it for resale.

(more...)

Did You Know...

Improvement Projects of the Now

GO WORK ON IT!

Social media pages are backlogged and in need of updating.

The following articles are in desperate need of transcription work:

The following long-term projects to improve the wiki are also needed:

  • A backlog of chats that extends back several years, to finish adding to chat pages or mention in articles. Some chats are still archived on Kiwi Farms only and need to be saved elsewhere.

Da Update

CWCki News.png
It is currently March 2026. It has been...
22
day(s) since Chris was last spotted in public.
61
day(s) since Chris has last livestreamed.

Record Streak: 233 days

We highly advise against seeking out Chris, or anyone who is or has previously been associated with him, in any way.

Current Updates
Only significant events are listed. For all current updates, read Chris's recent social media posts or browse the most recent changes to the CWCki.

Recently Uncovered Info

CWCki News

CWCki wants you by Java Jake.png
Account Creation
NOTE: You must be 18 years or older to get an account.

Account creation for the CWCki is open. To request an account, contact a CWCki Jerkop. They can be reached at -

the Official CWCki Server Discord - message:

  • Hurtful Truth Level, or
  • Larry the Larryhog

Official CWCki Server DiscordKiwi Farms forumCWCki Club forumr/ChrisChanSonichu

Check out the Official CWCki Server Discord, and the sections about Chris at the Kiwi Farms, the CWCki Club forums, and the Chris Chan subreddit, full of lively and often times thoughtful discussions on Chris and Sonichu. (Use the wiki talk pages or the CWCki-related channels in the Discord for article-related discussions).

Picture of the Now

CWC Nose Picking Chaos Crystal Control.png

Video of the Now