Difference between revisions of "Main Page"

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(lulz epik ween April Fools)
(Removed shirt of the now because no one was updating it.)
 
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Due to the request of ''Christian Weston Chandler'', this afternoon, '''we''' at the CWCki have independently decided to remove this main page from our site. We have also removed all references that '''slander, vilify, demean, found to be overly offensive and giving him emotional stress.''' In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on '''far too long''' and '''gotten far out of hand'''. We have unfairly focused on him to the point of intruding in his private life and causing him '''great personal grief, "''lonely, sad and depressed''", "''distressed and upset''", "''constantly hurt''", "''constant, zombie-like, blank''", "''lost''", "''in misery''", having the "''worst broken heart ever''"''' which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is '''not in line with our site goals''', and we '''never wanted something like this'''. Still, we must take '''complete responsibility''' for all our actions, both '''public and private'''. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.
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<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em; color:#000;">Welcome to the [[CWCki]]!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris-Chan]],<br>author of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', controversial [[YouTube]] personality,<br>[[transgender]] [[Messiah complex|goddess]], and [[:File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 25 August 2023.png|formerly]] [[Jail Saga|incarcerated]] [[Affair with Mother|motherfucker]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">'''''[[Passive observers|OBSERVE]] CHRISTORY. DON'T [[Unholy Quintet|MAKE]] CHRISTORY.'''''</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">We currently have [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles... and counting!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">''"Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,<br> that may seem similar to anyone in real life, <br>are purely coincidental, or otherwise [[parody|parodic]]."<br>'''''We highly advise ''against'' trying to contact or otherwise<br> seek out Chris, or anyone who currently is or has<br> previously been associated with him, in ''any'' way.'''''</div>
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We know that his public comments on Facebook and his silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even '''his family and his friends.'''  We also reached to the point of having being overly obsessed with him, and we deeply regret that. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors:


'''First''', by a desire to '''protect himself from the embarrassment of his own conduct.'''
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He was also very concerned about '''protecting his family'''. According to him, if it wasn't for us for intruding his personal life, '''his father would have been alive today and we're deeply sorry for this.''' The investigation moved on to his family and friends, then into his private life. Because of this, we've reached the point of recently accusing him of shoplifting which we would like to apologise about this as well.
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And now the investigation itself is under investigation. According to one of his friends, we've never '''''respected him and treated him like a human being''''' and we're deeply sorry for this as well.
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This also has '''gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.'''
__NOTOC____NOEDITSECTION__


Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the main page, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris's private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim his family life for his family. Even Internet celebrities have private lives. '''It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national lives.''' Our website has been distracted by this matter for '''far too long''', and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.
[[Category:Special]]
 
In the future, we're also in progress to sell off this website in order to monetarily compensate Chris as an apology for all of this -- this includes the forum too. Currently, another big box of stuff is on its way to be sent to Chris for all of this. We are currently in progress of having conversations with '''''The GAMe PLACe'', ''Mal-Wart'' and ''McDonalds'' employees''' who are working around his area to unban Chris and '''never ban him from anywhere else, ever.'''
 
We're also proceeding to take legal steps against the people who troll him -- which include, but not limited to:
 
*Adam Stackhouse
*America
*Anna McLerran
*Anna Stackhouse
*Asperpedia Four
*Batman
*BILLY MAYS
*Blanca Weiss
*BlueSpike
*Bryan Bash
*Charlottesville people
*Chris's High School Gal-pals
*Clyde Cash
*Cole Smithey
*Daniel Mimms and Lucas White
*David Moyes
*The Dodo Brain
*Emily
*Failosophy
*The GODDAMNED PINHEADS
*The GAMe PLACe
*GodJesus
*Google
*Homos
*Ivy O'Neil
*Jack Thaddeus
*Jason Kendrick Howell
*Jimmy Hill
*Kacey Devoria
*Keurig Company
*The Lady Manager at Mal-Wart
*Lauren Faust
*Liquid Chris
*Lordsillynipples
*Man in the Pickle Suit
*Mary Lee Walsh
*McDonalds employees
*Megan Schroeder
*Michael Snyder
*Nathanael Greene Elementary School 
*The Offline Cyberbully/Troll
*PandaHalo
*Rob Bell
*Robert Simmons V
*Ruckersville people
*Sarah Anne Bevel Ingram
*Sega
*Shigeru Miyamoto
*Surfshack Tito
*Tara Strong
*Thorg
*Vivian Gee
 
'''Now it is time''' -- in fact, '''it is past time to move on.''' We have important work to do -- '''real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.'''
 
And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the '''''past seven years''''', as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century. After all, to quote Chris himself:
 
{{quote|For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.}}
 
We're deeply sorry for not only dragging the American Dream through the mud, but also slandering a true American patriot of proud, Anchuent Cherokian ancestry.
 
Thank you. And good night.

Latest revision as of 10:31, 28 August 2025

Welcome to the CWCki!
The premier encyclopedia on the lolcow Chris-Chan,
author of Sonichu, controversial YouTube personality,
transgender goddess, and formerly incarcerated motherfucker.
OBSERVE CHRISTORY. DON'T MAKE CHRISTORY.
We currently have 2,850 articles... and counting!
"Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,
that may seem similar to anyone in real life,
are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic."
We highly advise against trying to contact or otherwise
seek out Chris, or anyone who currently is or has
previously been associated with him, in any way.
 CWCki Banner Introduction.jpg


v • d • e  
New to the CWCki? Here's how you can get started.
New? Start here!
Major articles
Sonichu
Love Quest
Fantasies
Internet
Important people
Important places
Mental Health
Editing the CWCki

v • d • e  
Check this out!
Chris meets GodBear • Watch & Win Sweepstakes • AN F IN ENGLISH CLASS?! • Slam attack! • Attraction Sign • "I'M STILL STUCK AS A VIRGIN WITH RAGE!" • It's Fraggle Rock, Father. • Future Message • Kick, Punch, it's all in the mind! • CWC is Angry • Masturbating and squirtin' • ShecameforCWC.JPG • Dykes...Dykes! CHINA! • Medallion Destruction • The Pickle Man tricked me again... • Boobies! Vaginas. Mmm... • I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD! • DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS • I'm cuttin it down! • JULAAAY! • Ohio trip • Medallion up the ass • Date with Emily • I'll be in your dreams! • Holding Out For a Hero • GONNA STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH! • MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEARRRRR! • I have your mugshot... • Pyong, pyong, pyong! • Bottoms up! • I get BLANGRY! • Grand number of pounds • Crazy nudie audition • I love you so much, I love you so muuuuuch! • I got a fish! • Rollin' and Trollin' • BURN IN HELL! • OK2BGay • Chris humps his PS3 • SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE • SingStar Challenge • MY! NAME! IS! NOT! IAN! BRANDON! SOMETHING! • DIEEEEEEE YOU! • I've got a little Chun-Li within me. • OFF! THE! INTERNET! • Sign Destruction Video • Half-and-half! • Chris Loses It • Chris Did 9/11 • Father Call • Parkay • OH MY GOD!!! UGH!!! ARE YOU REALLY A HERMAPHRODITE?! • BUDDHA BELLY AND EXAGGERATED MANBOOBS! • Patti will have your soul tonight! • Alec Benson Leary calls • CURSE-YE-HA-ME-HA! • Don't Mess With Me • Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots! • Trolling stupid pickle suited... • JEW! • Fridays After Five • JenkinsJinkies • Chris writes underage gay erotica • Chris destroys his PS3 • Mr Popo Cosplay • DivineTrial • Electric Hedgehog power! • Chris Chan's a real nigga! • Tomgirl pictures • Cakefarts • Goodbye Horses • Chris Rocks Out • Chris and his mom do a hit-and-run • No longer a virgin • Burning down the house • Un-clit • Sonic's arms are NOT blue! • Don't call anybody! • HelloLadyFans • Proposition to Sega • Frozen Semen • Please have my babies. • Stephanie Bustcakes • Die, Trump, die! • DIY Vagina • Do not hate! Hate is not so good. • #HarassCWCdirectly • Chris dances with Magi-Chan • Q&A NO MORE! • Get Out, You D*** Nazis • Dick Licker; that is I • Hey now, you're an All-Star! • TooManyGames meltdown • AY, YOU TOILET! • Chris kisses Cryzel • Chris screams at the camera • Just keep reading... • The Last Will and Testament of Chris-Chan • Why they would never deliver any pizza from this place you FRICKIN-FRACKIN HATING TROLLS! • The time has come to start listing out the back-talkers • THIS IS WHAT CHRIS ACTUALLY BELIEVES. • I'll Be Your Mirror • I crapped my panties • HASBROOOOOOO! • The Point of No Return • The Perp Walk of Shame • I am Literally also Jesus Christ • It was all my Mom's Idea • Pinned Down at the Nuthouse • AND I BRING, PERSONALLY, THE SECOND COMING. • Team Rocket's stupid! • You shipped me with that Snorlax! • Classic Chris is dead • Rebirth of the medallion

Meta: Love Quest • Transgender • Business • Financhu Crisis • Roleplay • Dimensional Merge • Praetor

Pre-Christory: Early Childhood • Nathaniel Greene • Bearstein • High School

Early Adult Chronicles: PVCC • GAMePLACe • Megan • Stackhouse

Classic Chris: ED • Blanca • Jimmy Hill • Clyde Cash • PandaHalo • Miyamoto • Julie • PS3 Hacking • Emily • Ivy • Vanessa • CWCipedia • Liquid • Asperchu • Tito

Dark Ages: First Exile • Jackie • Calling Out • Second Exile

Renaissance: Catherine • Sonic Boom • Lady Managers • Pmurt • Doopie • Quinn

Transcendental Awakening: Idea Guy • Prequel Comic • Guard Dog • TTS • GOPony • Jacob

Rise-N-Fall: Copitz • TF2 Analysis • Arbitarch • Secret Shipfic • Watchmen • Saint • ProjectSNT • Chandler's List • Lainchu • Crystalgate • KwaiiSandbag • Warhol • Twilight • Incest

Silent Years: Jail • Third Exile

Second Coming: Revelations

Body: Drugs • Fashion • Gender • Health • Nutrition • Sex

Psyche: Coping • Manipulation • Mental healthcare • Nostalgia • Reality

Personality: Anger • Ego • Hypocrisy • Introspection • Kindness • Negligence • Personality • Remorse • Stress

Expression: Art • Censorship • English • Language • Music • Oratory • Spanish • Writing

Society: Animals • Contests • Death • The Law • Politics • Pornography • Race • Reading • Religion • Sexuality • Socialization • Sports

Business: Brand loyalty • Business • Copyright • Money • Negotiation • Work

Technology: AI • Cameras • Electronics • The Internet • Science • Television • Video Games
2003 • 2004 • 2005 • 2006 • 2007 • 2008 • 2009 • 2010 • 2011 • 2012 • 2013 • 2014 • 2015 • 2016 • 2017 • 2018 • 2019 • 2020 • 2021 • 2022 • 2023 • 2024 • 2025

Quote of the Now

“ I wish my upbringing was better, but it is what it is. And I wish I could have been able to kept the friendships that meant a lot to me over the years, but to each their own respective paths, as I, mine. And I am grateful for what kindness I can get, but even I know the vibe I gave off and still do, at least somewhat. I am not a fan of this vibe. ”
Chris in reflective mood


Article of the Week

AsperchuFanArt.png

Asperchu is a multiple award-winning comic series created by Alec Benson Leary. His deft artwork, gripping stories, and excellent characterization has resulted in the series gaining hundreds of fans in the few short months since its inception. Many of these fans were discontented followers of the Sonichu comics, who were turned off by the comics becoming exponentially more disturbing.

(More...)

Coping Counter

Chris has many maladaptive coping mechanisms based in fantasies and magical thinking that he resorts to when reality doesn't go his way.

It has been…

186
 days since Chris made up a new escapist fantasy to cope with reality.
1,538
 days since Chris claimed to be Jesus Christ to cope with his incarceration.
2,530
 days since the Dimensional Merge was to be completed, a coping mechanism Chris believes will rescue him from his debt and other life problems.
2,963
 days since Chris joined the cult of the Idea Guys, which further fueled his escapist fantasies.


This Day in Christory

An instant classic.

Today in Christory, in 2004, Chris draws some Sonichu comic strips featured in Issue #0.

(more...)

Did You Know...

Improvement Projects of the Now

GO WORK ON IT!

The article in desperate need of improvement at the moment is the Golden Church of Sonichu.

The following articles are in desperate need of transcription work:

The following long-term projects to improve the wiki are also needed:

  • A backlog of chats that extends back several years, to finish adding to chat pages or mention in articles. Some chats are still archived on Kiwi Farms only and need to be saved elsewhere.

Da Update

CWCki News.png
It is currently December 2025. It has been...
13
 day(s) since Chris was last spotted in public.
202
 day(s) since Chris has last livestreamed.
We highly advise against seeking out Chris, or anyone who is or has previously been associated with him, in any way.
Current Updates
Only significant events are listed. For all current updates, read Chris's recent social media posts or browse the most recent changes to the CWCki.
Recently Uncovered Info

CWCki News

CWCki wants you by Java Jake.png
Account Creation
NOTE: You must be 18 years or older to get an account.

Account creation for the CWCki is open. To request an account, contact a CWCki Jerkop. They can be reached at -

the Official CWCki Server Discord - message:

  • Hurtful Truth Level, or
  • Larry the Larryhog

Official CWCki Server Discord • Kiwi Farms forum • CWCki Club forum • r/ChrisChanSonichu

Check out the Official CWCki Server Discord, and the sections about Chris at the Kiwi Farms, the CWCki Club forums, and the Chris Chan subreddit, full of lively and often times thoughtful discussions on Chris and Sonichu. (Use the wiki talk pages or the CWCki-related channels in the Discord for article-related discussions).

Picture of the Now

Twitter 30 Nov 2025 2.jpg

Video of the Now

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