December 2009

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On 9 December 2009 Chris decides he's getting a Family Guy episode.
On 13 December 2009 Chris starts writing a Christmas story.
On 15 December 2009 Chris raps about rape.
On 30 December 2009 Chris found a way to make his website even uglier.

Chris started the month answering the mailbag, but with shorter, less-enthusiastic answers. He also created additional "rejected" mailbags to handle questions that made him feel uncomfortable - namely, those dealing with homosexuality and autism. Chris would also publish a vitriolic screed against people with Asperger's Syndrome. Chris would upload several disturbing YouTube videos: one with him performing a baffling improvised rap that suggested he was a drug-crazed rapist, another rap video where he was painted up like an Insane Clown Posse groupie, and 10 minutes of him playing with homemade Lego figurines of Sonichu and Rosechu. Chris tried his hand at writing a story again, and after spending six hours writing A Sonichu Christmas Story (which consisted of a few rough, unedited paragraphs) tried to finish the story in comic form. It dragged on past Christmas day. Unflattering photos of Chris appeared on a Times Square Billboard: all real pictures of him drinking his semen and such except for one where he was Photoshopped into a gay bar. Chris was also infuriated by increasingly explicit pro-gay banner ads which appeared on CWCipedia. He would direct his hatred at Jack Thaddeus, who would be the subject of video death threats on Christmas Day. Chris would close out the year by going batshit insane about the gay ads and mailing a letter to President Barack Obama requesting that the gay ads be made illegal.

Events of December 2009

  • 1 December - Chris uploads page 94 of issue 9. Instead of a background, Chris fills large areas with purple and orange.
  • 1 December - Chris answers the letters in Mailbag 7. Many of these answers are exceptionally rude.
  • 2 December - Chris uploads page 95.
  • 2 December - Chris responds to the letters in Mailbag 8. He also creates the Autism Mailbag, as a part of the ongoing war between himself and people who know what Asperger's syndrome is.
  • 3 December - Chris tries jogging, confuses the acrobatic sport "parkour" with a brand of margarine and posts a Captain's Log Update where he speaks about his four minutes of physical activity (with numerous breaks), Sonichu merchandise and Little Big Planet.
  • 4 December - Chris uploads two new pages
  • 4 December - Chris uploads a very interesting rant about Aspergers, and answers the letters in Mailbag 9.
  • 5 December - Chris gives a "Happy Holidays" speech, and draws Sonichu in the snow
  • 5 December - Chris uploads page 97, in which he implies that only he is allowed to kill Mary Lee Walsh.
  • 6 December - Jack Thaddeus calls Chris twice. Hilarity and confrontation ensues.
  • 6 December - Chris answers all the letters in Mailbag 10, and begs his sysop to make it stop.
  • 7 December - Chris uploads the final two pages in issue 9.
  • 7 December - Chris promises that issue 10 will be his final appearance as with every person he met in real life in the Sonichu canon.
  • 7 December - Chris's sysop uploads Mailbag 11 and (fortunately) denies Chris's plea to cut off the stressful mails.
  • 8 December - Chris's sysop uploads Mailbag 12.
  • 9 December - Chris answers Mailbag 11 in the early hours of the morning.
  • 9 December - Chris upload a Captain's Log Update where he ask about donations and talk about the future of the Sonichu franchise.
  • 9 December - Chris answers Mailbag 12.
  • 10 December - In the early hours of the morning, Chris answers Mailbag 13, and rambles about Family Guy.
  • 10 December - Chris uploads two more comics, outlining the beginning of his plan to cure the world of homosexuality, and answers Mailbag 14. He also criticizes Family Guy.
  • 10 December - Chris uploads a video in which he reads fan mail and demands that fans only send him console games instead of PC games.
  • 11 December - Chris uploads two more pages and answers Mailbag 15.
  • 12 December - Chris congratulates Jack Black for winning a Spike Video Game Award.
  • 12 December - Chris uploads two more pages, and answers Mailbag 16.
  • 13 December - Chris begin the writing of a Christmas story, and answers Mailbag 17 with unprecedented amounts of censorship.
  • 14 December - Chris posts a new page and starts up Issue 11.
  • 15 December - In the early hours of the day, Chris answers half of Mailbag 18, and then starts messing around with his old censorship in other mailbags.
  • 15 December - Chris uploads a video to prove to us that he can fail at rap. He mentions things that can possibly lead to the assumption that he is using viagra and that he wants a black girl.
  • 16 December - Chris posts a new page in issue 10, and a new page in issue 11.
  • 16 December - Chris posts a new blog entry, discussing his intent to create a page that "sorts out Fact from Fiction from that God D*** Encyclopedia Dramatica page". He also experiences a bout with a computer virus, and goes on a road trip to visit his relatives.
  • 17 December - Chris proves to us again that he fails at rapping again, but as a Juffalo this time.
  • 17 December - Chris finishes answering Mailbag 18.
  • 17 December - Chris posts a new entry, taking the entirety of the ED page and edit it to be TRUE and HONEST on his wiki.
  • 18 December - Chris posts a new page in issue 10, and a new page in issue 11. He also posts pictures of his ModNation CWCVille project.
  • 19 December - In the early hours of the morning, Chris updated his blog, and answered Mailbag 19.
  • 20 December - Chris torments Kitty Chandler, talks about his shitty computer, and whines about Clyde Cash.
  • 21 December - Chris finishes answering Mailbag 20 and Mailbag 21. Chris's Sysop uploads Mailbag 22.
  • 22 December - In the early hours of the morning, Chris uploads a a new page in issue 10, linking it to the preview, and five new pages to Issue 11.
  • 23 December - Chris uploads two new pages to Issue 11
  • 24 December - Recognizing that excited people waiting for Christmas might need help getting to sleep tonight, Chris gives the internet a video where he plays with Lego to help everyone out.
  • 24 December - Chris gives a shout-out to the Columbine shooters.
  • 25 December - Chris makes another video endorsing murder, this time of Jack Thaddeus.
  • 26 December - Chris makes a video in which he announces that he is making his LittleBigPlanet level available for download. He then made a CWCipedia page begging people to not alter his awesome level in any way.
  • 26 December - Chris posts two new pages, and updates his terms of use page in regards to the gay ads.
  • 26 December - Chris posts a new CWCipedia page begging people to not alter his awesome level in any way.
  • 26 December - Chris notices that he now has a twitter feed, and freaks the hell out. However, he quickly deletes the statement as damage control.
  • 27 December - Chris uploads a video about homosexuality and why suicide is a valid option for Clyde and Jack.
  • 28 December - Chris replaces the homo ad on his site with one for Coke, and bitches to his admin.
  • 28 December - Chris posts two new pages and a short diatribe on ads, twitter, and da homos.
  • 28 December - Chris answers the letters in Mailbag 23, CWCipedia's Sysop upload the Mailbag 25 and Mailbag 26.
  • 28 December - The Twitter feed appears on the front page of CWCipedia. It is promptly overrun by trolls.
  • 29 December - Chris answers the letters in Mailbag 24 and Mailbag 25.
  • 30 December - Chris answers Mailbag 26, Mailbag 27 and Mailbag 28.
  • 30 December - Chris changes the CWCipedia welcome image in an attempt to get the ads taken down.
  • 31 December - CWCipedia's Sysop upload the Mailbag 29, Mailbag 30 and Mailbag 31.
  • 31 December - Chris goes batshit insane about the gay ads, makes a video about being locked out of the front page of CWCipedia, and sends a letter to President Barack Obama requesting that gay ads be made illegal.
  • 31 December - Chris, deciding to end the year on a high note, answers Mailbag 29 with oneliners and insults. A few choice letters, he responded to with "Whatever", so that sysop can not present them again. Keep in mind these letters were supposed to have been answered weeks ago, and were all constructive and meaningful.
  • 31 December - The PVCC message-board moves to a different host.