Christian Weston Chandler
- This article is about Chris himself... it is his article and nothing less! For the "Sonichu" character, see Christian Weston Chandler (comic character). For other uses, see Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation).
- "Christian" redirects here. For our hero's view on Christianity, see Chris and religion.
This article is rated M for Honest Content
It may contain content deemed not safe for work. Reader discretion is advised.
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Gender disclosure: This person currently identifies as MTF transgender. Pronoun usage on this page may or may not reflect biological sex and/or gender identity. |
“ | I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA. | ” |
KookyDashy, aka Chris[1] |
Chris Chandler | |
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Information | |
Name | Christopher Weston Chandler (1982–1992) Christian Weston Chandler (1992–2016) Christine Weston Chandler (2016–2018) Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu (2018–2020, not a legal name change) Sonichu (2020–present, not a legal name change) |
Also known as | Chris-Chan CWC Ricardo RWC Father Pop Papa Ian Brandon Anderson Solid Chris Junior Jenkins Carlos Chantor KookyDashy Kaka Apple Chrissy paintingatree Stephanie Bustcakes Night Star CPU Blue Heart CWC Psychlight LegendaryChristorian OPL (Our Pet Lolcow) Natalie Portman Grandma Christine Mother Mama |
Date of Birth | 24 February 1982 (age 42, Pisces, Dog) |
Gender | Male (1982–2011) Tomgirl (2011–2014) Transwoman (2015–present) |
Nationality | American |
Race | White (1/8th "Cherokian") |
Height | 5'11" (1.80 m)[2] |
Weight | 209 lbs. (94.8 kg)[3] |
Father | Robert Franklin Chandler Jr. (1927–2011) |
Mother | Barbara Chandler (1941–present) |
Siblings | Cole Smithey (half-brother) David Alan Chandler (half-brother) Carol Chandler (half-sister) |
Education | Piedmont Virginia Community College (CADD) |
Occupations | Freelance comic book artist (self-published) Video game designer (unpublished) Wendy's employee (2001) Cutco salesman (2003) Male escort (2010, unpaid) Entrepreneur, Cwcville Shopping (2014–2016) Prostitute (2016, unpaid) |
Spouse(s) | Cryzel Rosechu, Magi-Chan Sonichu (m. March 2018) Sylvana Rosechu and Mewtwo (m. June 2018)[4] |
Titles | Sonichu Creator Chronicler of Sonichu & Rosechu CPU Goddess of the Nations of Cwcville, Comma, and the Commodore Consoles[5] The Queen of Modern Laughter[6] |
Christopher Christian Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu (born 24 February 1982) is a 42-year-old autistic, mentally ill[7] individual, a former virgin with rage, and a self-proclaimed deity. He is commonly referred to by his initials CWC, by his nickname Chris-Chan, or simply the gender-neutral Chris. He looks kind of like a cartoon version of Benjamin Franklin come to life, and is considered to be one of the most well-known and well-documented lolcows in internet culture.
Some would consider Chris to be a celebrity, but he hasn't sold a multiplatinum album, nor has he been awarded with an Oscar. Instead, he is the creator of the infamous webcomic Sonichu, which ostensibly tells the story of an Electric Hedgehog Pokémon Sonichu and his sweetheart Rosechu and their adventures with the Chaotic Combo. In practice, the webcomic really serves as wish fulfillment for Chris himself, allowing him to express his dissatisfaction with how the faculty at school and college didn't acknowledge what he saw as an exemplary academic performance when he graduated, along with his frustration over being unable to find a romantic partner; as such, the book serves as a fantasy in which he can redirect his anger toward the people who would impede him on his journey, casting them as villains and himself as a true Campbellian hero. After completing high school and college, Chris has remained largely unemployed for most of his adult life, making a living off of welfare and occasional donations from his webcomic's True and Loyal Fanbase.
In late 2007, he became Internet-famous when images of him at a tabletop gaming store leaked out to the Something Awful message boards. Upon discovery, Chris was mocked for his odd fashion sense and oafish appearance, and images of Chris at the store soon spread to places like 4chan and Encyclopedia Dramatica, and in the process, many trolls became exposed to his webcomic for the first time, propelling Chris to stardom. Initial fascination was spurred on by his childlike artwork, his signature homemade Sonichu medallion that he wore in public, and his history of loitering in public places while literally holding up a sign asking women to talk to him. His reaction to the ensuing mockery led to a cycle of Chris revealing more disturbing facts about himself and trolls going to greater and greater lengths to uncover more knowledge about this strange individual. Thus, Chris's life began to spiral out of control with the advent of organized trolling, armchair psychological analysis from bewildered onlookers, and some truly bizarre antics from Chandler that continue to this day, influencing the development of the webcomic on the rare occasions that he actually updates it.
Chris's most notable period of activity on the internet occurred between 2007 and 2010 – a period now dubbed the "Classic Era" by modern Christorians – in which he was repeatedly baited by trolls pretending to be romantic interests and he lashed out against arch-enemy Clyde Cash, the leader of the most notable group of trolls in his life: The Miscreants. In this time, he was duped by a sadistic 13-year-old into stuffing his medallion up his ass, had his identity stolen by a far more talented individual, and had Sonichu mercilessly spoofed by a webcomic team that specifically designed a story that would piss him off, among other misadventures. However, he eventually decided to sign off from the internet at the end of this period, seemingly wising up to his dang dirty trolls...but when he inevitably returned to the limelight a few months later in 2011, he was not the same. Chris began to experiment with crossdressing, calling himself a "Tomgirl", before eventually coming out as transgender in 2015 and beginning the process of transitioning.
Aside from Chris's newfound shift in gender identity, the death of his father, accidentally setting his house on fire, and an incident where he maced an employee at a GameStop store over the color of Sonic's arms, Chris's internet life stayed relatively normal (by his standards) until two new sets of trolls – known as the Idea Guys and the Teen Troon Squad – brainwashed him with increasingly-insane beliefs (such as the idea that he is half-Sonichu), culminating in Chris's revelation that he is a goddess meant to bring about a convergence of dimensions that will merge the world shown in his webcomic with our world, effectively starting a doomsday cult around what started as a silly, self-indulgent Sonic the Hedgehog and Pokémon crossover. Since then, Chris has used this delusion as an elaborate coping mechanism while he continues to avoid looking for employment or other ways to better himself.
In spite of the trolls in question being driven out by the effort of groups of counter-trolls trying to keep Chris from going further down a self-destructive path, or at least to keep him from embarrassing himself any further, Chris continues to cling to these unhealthy and downright absurd beliefs. All the while, Chris's physical and mental health are withering away, and money is becoming a serious issue for the Chandler household, and Chris's mother isn't long for this world, all of which has led Chris to retreat even further into his fantasies. It's gotten to the point where he now pretends to be possessed by various fictional characters on a regular basis, with one period of possession by the character of Sonichu – which has lasted for nearly an entire year and is still ongoing – occurring a way for Chris to cope with the fact that he wasn't able to attend two iterations of a My Little Pony convention that had been cancelled during the COVID-19 pandemic.
There has never been an internet personality quite like Chris-Chan, thanks to the unique circumstances leading to his prominence online, and it is the dedicated mission of this very wiki to chronicle his life in ridiculous detail. If you want to go down the rabbit hole with us, then you should probably start by reading this page. Buckle up, because this is going to be a long ride.
Overview
PROTIP:
While Chris now identifies as a woman, the CWCki continues to refer to Christian only by his true, original gender and GodBear-given name, to keep consistent to classical records when he referred to himself as a man. There is also some debate among Christorians over whether or not Chris can truly be considered transgender.
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Chris is a timid, autistic, 42-year-old self-identified transwoman with delusional tendencies who has been allowed – by his parents, Barbara Chandler and the deceased Bob Chandler – to eternally live like a child, amassing toys and video games into a single room in his parents' house. Even into his late thirties, he is so comfortable in his protected existence that he refuses to conform to the norms of society, despite his need for independence becoming direr as his mother's health fails. Chris regularly demonstrates having trouble with acceptable public behavior, recognizing when he needs to use the washroom, and using his time to contribute to society in any meaningful way. Although the public school system forced Chris to face reality, graduation has allowed Chris to stay indoors and avoid taking part in typical civilian activities, opting instead to stick to the comfort of living at home and subsisting off of taxpayer dollars. Due to this avoidance of the outside world, Chris hasn't held a steady job since 2001 (commissions and multi-level marketing aside), and he hasn't been employed for more than a few months in his whole life. It is likely Chris will never get a job again thanks to Patreon, the tugboat, the begging generous donations, and the fact he has flat out said his autism prevents him from getting a job (in spite of there being many social services available to help people with disabilities find work). Chris has had shockingly few meaningful relationships with people in a social setting outside of his parents, although he does manage to make friends with people who share his interests in nerd and LGBT culture[8].
Chris is completely obsessed with his OC and the associated comic, to the point that he has hand-crafted several medallions in Sonichu's shape. Between February 2004 and March 2010, Chris was rarely seen or photographed without one of these totems, even wearing them in his driver's license photo and to his college graduation; the medallion disappeared for a time, but returned in September 2010. At the same time, he is absolutely convinced that everyone wants to learn about Sonichu, and that the only reason Nintendo, Sega, and Sony haven't approached him about making Sonichu games is that they're either tough negotiators, or that his chances are being ruined by trolls working for them. For awhile, Chris had been upkeeping an eBay shop where he would make and sell these medallions, including Sonichu, Rosechu, Blake, and even custom character options. These were sold for $30 apiece. After the eBay shop became a mild success he moved to Etsy, however, his laziness got the best of him and he lost the shop after nine months in business, due to failing to fulfill orders.
Chris used to absolutely hate gay men, and communicated this with such intensity that observers were easily convinced he was simply terrified of becoming gay himself. He cannot bear to look at another man's penis, and he stared at a Sailor Moon poster to keep himself straight.[9] Chris' words do not always align with his actions; throughout his early Internet history, he appeared to be deeply insecure about his gender and sexuality. Even prior to his gender transition, he has swallowed his own semen, worn a bra, and only reined in his tendency to proudly cross-dress because his elderly mother intensely disapproved. While these actions do not indicate homosexuality outright, they do question the validity of Chris's own judgments on his sexual orientation. Surprisingly, however, his homophobia seemed to have little basis in his religious beliefs, as he had not noticed Leviticus 18:22, which condemns homosexuality, until he saw it on a 2009 episode of Family Guy.[10] However, his homophobia didn't extend to lesbians, whom he "partially [en]courages" and is even aroused by. Over time, Chris dropped his homophobic tendencies, apologized in 2015 and supports what he calls the SLGBTQ spectrum. In 2018, the Idea Guys brainwashed Chris into identifying as bisexual.
His adult life has been largely defined by his goals of developing Sonichu into a hit media franchise, his Love Quest to obtain a "boyfriend-free, 18-[his current age]-year old, caring, smoke-free, non-alcoholic white girl" to make into a "sweetheart from the ground-up," and, beginning from 2011, his gender identity as a tomgirl and later a lesbian transwoman.
Early life
On 24 February 1982, Chris was born Christopher Weston Chandler to his parents to Robert and Barbara. He was born in the United States, specifically in the state of Virginia, and of course, is a citizen of the US. Not much was known about Chris in his toddler years, but the signs of autism didn't creep up until he was older. At the time, he was a pretty normal kid.
Childhood and adolescence
Chris claims his first word, "monkey", was spoken at 6 weeks old,[11] and he remains proud of this feat into his thirties regardless of how obviously unlikely and physically impossible it is to be true – the language centers in the human brain literally cannot grasp English at 6 weeks, disregarding infantile vocal chords.
An abusive babysitter, who was alone with Christopher every day for years,[12] allegedly locked him in a toy room at an early age after turning all the lights off, an event he described as being intensely traumatic for him.[11] (Chris apparently misses the irony in the fact that he now regularly locks himself in a room, surrounded by toys.) He once identified this confinement as the source of his autism (which is wishful thinking on Chris's part, considering that autism is a genetic condition that isn't activated by external events). Between the ages of 1 and 7, Chris did not speak at all, and had to visit James Madison University for speech therapy. He was diagnosed with high-functioning autism, with the doctor projecting (at least according to Chris) that he would never make it to high school, much less be able to write his own name.[13] However, Chris was able to meet these cognitive milestones in time.
During the 1980s, Christopher was playmates with Sarah Nicole Hammer. One day, she convinced him that Casper the Friendly Ghost lived in the crawlspace under her house, and when he crawled in there to look, she locked him in,[14] beginning Chris's lifelong career of getting trolled. Apparently, he doesn't hold any hard feelings over it (possibly just because she's a girl – if a guy did that to him, Chris would vow vengeance). In 1992, noted ursine conductor Leonard Bearstein misheard Christopher's first name and called him "Christian", which inexplicably convinced Christopher to later have his name legally changed.
Chris spent the 1990-1991 school year in the fourth grade at Nathanael Greene Elementary School, until his parents pulled him out of classes over a mysterious dispute. Chris claims that he was forcefully restrained by the school's faculty[15] and that he was made to sit on the lap of the principal, an experience that supposedly inspired his homophobia. It's possible that Chris's opinions about these events are colored more by his parents' attitudes than his own memories. The issue went to court, with Greene County seeking to have Chris sent to a "special school", which Bob and Barbara likely interpreted to mean a nut-house. Chris was home-schooled through the 5th grade during these proceedings. When his family exhausted all legal recourse, Chris and his father relocated to Richmond so that Chris could continue his education in a different school system, starting with the sixth grade in fall 1992.[11]
At age 11, Chris entered and won the Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes. On his 12th birthday, he enjoyed a $1,000 shopping spree as his prize. WVIR-TV's coverage of the event focused on Chris's autism, regarding the contest win as a worthy accomplishment due to his mental condition. Chris put footage from this newscast on YouTube long before he was known to the general public, and it remains the most solid evidence that he is not an elaborate troll. This incident is often cited as the beginning of Chris's tendency to use his autism as leverage for special treatment, as well as his fascination with toys and video games at the expense of more mature pursuits. It has also led Chris to constantly enter contests in hopes of winning big (or else becoming infuriated and belligerent to the winners when he loses).
Holding a prototype Sonichu Ball.
Chris's taste in clown shirts begins, coupled with his infamous "deer in headlights" stare.
More of young Christian |
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Chris spent much of his time in high school playing video games at home, reading Goosebumps novels, and hanging out with his "gal pals" and "friend" at school. It was at this time that he first put his "creative talents" to use, with the inventions of Bionic the Hedgehog and Sonichu, the latter of which was created for a class project simply because he couldn't use copyrighted characters.[16] (The irony that Chris's own solution to that problem was to merge two copyrighted characters into a new character is somehow still lost on him, even to this day.) After inventing his magnum opus with the character of Sonichu, Chris began to incorporate his original character into everything that he could, although his passion for his character wouldn't truly surface until college.
Chris claims to have been on the honor roll, and during this time acquired the true source of his powers, his Amnyfest Ring. Because the art award he wanted was given to someone else, Chris became despondent and stormed out crying during his high school graduation. He honestly thought he deserved the award more than anyone else because he worked on it "so hard" in spite of his autism, ignoring the likelihood that the artistic achievements of his peers were simply better. Another reason for his sorrow was his fear that he might soon have to grow up and start acting like an adult, a phase of his life that his parents had not properly prepared him for.[17] Evidently, this fear was unfounded.
Since leaving high school and the happiest years of his life, Chris has been unwilling and unable to progress in any other aspect of his life, and has unfortunately even regressed in several key areas as he gets older. He remains trapped in a childish, Year 2000 time-stasis, as he believes that whatever he was doing at the time was what helped him attract female companions. That his high school gal-pals have moved on and married real adult men with careers is of little consequence to him. Chris still pines for "better days" in spite of his current belief system hypothetically leaving him in a better place than he ever was in high school. As you might imagine, this is precisely because things didn't get much better for Chris after finishing school.
Chris's award-winning artwork |
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Adult Chronicles
Chris's entry into Piedmont Virginia Community College probably eased his inability to cope with life after high school. He took courses in Computer Aided Drafting and Design and began spending more time on Sonichu, launching a newsletter and circulating it on the PVCC campus. Over time, he began losing touch with his gal-pals from high school, and he presumably found the junior college crowd less willing to humor him and his personal idiosyncrasies. By his own admission, his social life at PVCC was lacking when compared to his high school years.[18][19] Chris says he decided he needed a sweetheart in February 2003. Possibly driven by his discovery that his old friend Sarah Hammer had begun dating Wes Iseli, Chris started his Love Quest in earnest that summer. However, he quickly found that every girl he talked to had a boyfriend (or so they claimed). Chris soon became neurotic about the "Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor" and began concocting and employing various bizarre methods to attract women without actually having to approach or speak to them.
Chris's most celebrated technique involved sitting in one place (or pacing back and forth) for hours, holding a sign that read "I am a (variable age)-Year Old, Single Male, seeking an 18-(Chris's age then)-Year Old, Single Female Companion." Amazingly, this strategy accomplished nothing beyond getting him into trouble with various authority figures who believed that he was loitering and/or soliciting sex, which was legally true. Chris was particularly affected by a series of confrontations with the PVCC dean Mary Lee Walsh over his attraction techniques, resulting in an ongoing, completely one-sided blood feud involving magic curses and slander. After a series of confrontations featuring increasingly bizarre and threatening behavior on Chris's part, Walsh expelled him for one year in 2004. He eventually returned, however, obtaining an associate's degree in May 2006.
After college and completing his education, Chris promptly dropped out of society, devoting his life to finding a boyfriend-free girl, drawing Sonichu, mass debating, and using his welfare money to buy video games and sex toys. He would not make any serious attempts to seek out a career from graduation onward, in spite of attaining a degree that could probably net him a decent-paying (and relatively undemanding) career that would likely grant him more opportunities than sitting at home playing video games ever could.
In 2005, Chris met Megan Schroeder at a local game and card shop. A social outcast like himself, Megan proved unusual in that she was willing to talk to Chris for more than 5 minutes. The two quickly became close friends, although Megan claimed to have recently endured a bad break-up and refused to entertain Chris's obvious romantic interest. Chris, seemingly basing his stance on studying women in porn and anime, believed that the key to turning Megan's platonic feelings romantic was to make inappropriate advances toward her until she had to tell him to stop touching her (a habit that got so bad that Megan later equated it to sexual harassment).
In the summer of 2007, Chris put it all on the line by entering the PaRappa the Rapper Contest so that he could win prizes and a trip for two to Seattle, which formed the centerpiece of his plan to finally score with Megan. The contest ended in disaster for Chris, as he lost to the dreaded Adam Stackhouse and subsequently learned that Megan wouldn't have gone with him on the trip even if he had won.
It was during the Love Quest that Chris was inspired to launch Sonichu, a comic book series featuring his Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. Ostensibly, the comic was intended to focus on the life and times of Chris's unbelievably original character, but by halfway through the first issue, the focus of the story had become Chris and his myriad of romantic misadventures. Little would Chris know, however, that his life was about to permanently change as a result writing and drawing of his magnum opus.
Classic Era
“ | Geez, when you have me facepalming at you, you have got to be pretty bad off. | ” |
David Gonterman on Chris. |
Chris's rare talent (and by talent we mean pathology) was discovered when someone posted an anonymous picture of Sonichu on 4chan. It only took a quick Google search of Chris's name to discover the picture's author. He was also discovered on 26 October 2007 by the website SomethingAwful, when a user derailed an unrelated conversation and wrote their personal account of Chris. A thread on Chris and Sonichu was created the next day.[20] Chris's miserable existence spilled over onto Encyclopedia Dramatica in November 2007. His life hasn't been the same since then, and shockingly enough, Chris himself shoulders some of the blame for why that is.
Upon learning of the "Chris-Chan" article on ED, Chris released a single YouTube video attempting to diplomatically convince the site to remove the page. Failing in this, he then spent the next several months vandalizing the article in the vain hope of overwhelming his enemies. This catastrophically backfired as Chris, in an attempt to prove himself as lurid as the trolls, revealed a great deal of embarrassing information, most notably a portrait of himself finger-banging Megan that ruined his most important relationship at the time, giving the trolls justification to continue their war against Chris in the process. By the spring of 2008, Chris would be banned from both his favorite hangout (temporarily, but he was banned permanently in August 2008) and his parents' church for reasons at least partially related to information brought to light by the ED article.
In August 2008, Chris declared war upon Encyclopedia Dramatica in a series of videos, threatening to withhold publication of the upcoming Sonichu #7 unless his vast fan base rallied to force ED to remove the "Chris-Chan" article. When ED suffered outages unrelated to this crusade, Chris took credit and declared victory, guaranteeing that he would be under constant fire from trolls for years to come. This began an endless cycle in which Chris would produce videos, comics, and harebrained schemes to attack the trolls, which would in turn encourage more and more trolls to provoke him for his hilarious responses.
The cycle was briefly disrupted in the fall of 2008 when Chris sent his various medallions to his fake Internet girlfriend, who immediately destroyed them and broke up with him. This emotional heartbreak and the release of LittleBigPlanet reduced Chris's output of videos and other sources of Laughs Under Lucricities. At the same time, Encyclopedia Dramatica began cracking down on trolls using Chris's ED page as a forum for discussing him, and in general, opinion was divided as to whether it was funny or obnoxious and tiring to continue harassing him. The resulting schism led to the creation of numerous websites (such as this one singularly devoted to documenting his life), which has only expanded the coverage of Chris's hijinks.
By late 2008, trolls controlled many aspects of Chris's life by posing as dedicated fans, sweethearts, cartoonish enemies, and prospective business partners. Chris's ego and naïvete readily embraced this brave new world in which every woman wanted to fuck him, every man was either trying to help him sell Sonichu products or steal the franchise for their own nefarious goals, and that any and all trolls were a vocal minority on his way to fame and fortune. Trolls would begin denoting major events in Chris's life as "sagas" such as the Miyamoto Saga, the Julie Saga, the Ivy Saga, the Liquid Saga, and the Asperchu Saga. All the while, the editors and administrators working at Encyclopedia Dramatica and the CWCki maintained a constant record of these events, ensuring that Chris could not get away with his highly selective and revisionary treatment of his history.
Following his disastrous failure to woo a real girl in March 2010, Chris began to realize what anyone else would have figured out a long time ago: that his internet presence and the toxic cycle of exposing something about himself, getting exploited or otherwise made fun of by trolls, and reacting poorly to said trolling was having a detrimental effect upon his mental health and social life, with every new video that he created exasperating the problem. This realization appears to have led him to reduce his online presence and to stop donning Sonichu medallions and clown shirts. For a time, it looked like Chris was learning from his experiences and was making an effort to improve his own lot in life.
In November 2010, around the same time another romantic saga involving another sweetheart ended in failure, Chris announced he will no longer socialize online or publish videos of himself. Subsequently, all videos save for the last one were removed from his YouTube channel. Alas, the good times were not to last, as it was quickly discovered that his Internet activity had not completely ceased since he retired from YouTube. Instead of investing his time into more productive activities or improving on his social skills, Chris spent much more time playing video games and otherwise goofing off. In a predictable fashion, he ultimately forgot anything that he might have learned from his experiences of being one of the internet's biggest punching bags, and he subsequently returned to making new videos starting on August 2011... Albeit with a pretty big change in how he presented himself online.
Tomgirl Era
Perhaps the most dramatic change in Chris's life was his open and enthusiastic embrace of cross-dressing and femininity in general. In 2011, Chris was revealed to have become a full-blown transvestite (or "tomgirl", as he calls it) and fully embraced his new identity both at home and in public. Chris seems to have reconciled this behavior with his extreme homophobia and purported heterosexuality without any difficulty. Though treated as yet another saga at first, this behavior seems to be deeply entrenched and became more extreme in late 2014 and the years that followed (see below).
In September 2011, Chris's father died of heart failure. Chris continues to live with his widowed mother, who along with the tugboat is his only source of income. Since his mother is in her 70s, it can be reasonably assumed that she has little time left on this earth, especially when her poor health is taken into account.
Since Bob's death, Chris has seldom interacted with trolls, and is seemingly no longer able to effortlessly bounce back from despair like he used to, and has instead lapsed into a deep depression, no doubt exacerbated by the later loss of his home to fire, and subsequent financial difficulties. In the aftermath of Bob's death, many trolls began to question whether Chris deserved or indeed, could cope with any further trolling, given that he was no longer the bellicose, striped-shirted egocentric that the world had come to know. If one thing is certain, it is that Chris's glory days of screaming into a camera like a madman and performing like a circus animal for trolls offering china are over.
In October 2011, Chris and Barb were arrested at The GAMe PLACe and charged on several counts including trespassing, assault, and failure to stop at an accident causing over $1,000 in damage after an altercation with Michael Snyder. The trespassing and assault charges against Chris were dropped, but both still face felony trials for the failure to stop, and Barb for assaulting a police officer.
In April 2012, Chris declared that he finally lost his virginity. This was later confirmed to be true... at the hands of a prostitute. 2012 was otherwise uneventful, probably because Chris was in trouble with the law.
2013 saw Chris's life more or less confined to ranting on Facebook and Twitter, as well as making himself a pariah to people in real life through his actions. He began blaming people to their face for his own shortcomings which resulted in him leaving his church, getting chewed out by a voice actress from one of his favorite shows, upsetting the few friends he has left with his homophobia and getting thrown out of a Walmart for committing blatant vandalism. He has also complained about the "stress" taking its toll on his health (this, at least, is evident) and pined incessantly about being "lonely". Even the "gal-pals" Chris so fondly talked about in his high school days would end up betraying him – he found out around Halloween 2013 that they had only tolerated him out of pity and, having discovered them, were just as revolted by his antics as much as the next sane person. Of course, the miseries Chris was lamenting at this time were almost entirely products of his own behavior coming back to haunt him, something he clearly did not realize.
The year 2013 also saw the rise of quite a few new white knights as well (including actual friends he met in real life) all of whom tried to offer constructive advice to Chris, although their advice was unwelcome information and thus totally ignored, as tradition dictates. This year of Chris's life seemed to have been most characterized by his flagrant disrespect of people, things and ideas around him, resulting in his exile and loneliness which he idiotically (but predictably) did not connect with his appalling behavior.
At first, it seemed that 2014 would just be business as usual. That is, until January 10th when, in a cataclysmic display of the idiocy we've come to expect from him, Chris thought it would be a good idea to brew coffee in the bathroom of his garbage-filled house with an extension cord, leading to him setting his own house on fire. While no human was seriously harmed, one of the remaining Chandler cats died in the fire. The resulting damages forced Chris and his mother to temporarily move out and trash a different house. Almost all of the Chandler possessions were destroyed in the fire, including most of Chris's vast hoard of stupid shit. On a sadder note, most if not all of Bob's possessions were presumably also destroyed, including his huge record collection.
Since then, Chris and his mother have been having acute financial difficulties, and Chris has spent most of the year alternating between begging and taking the odd commission to make more of his horrendous "art" on Facebook, or in a new display of narcissism, selling autographed photos of himself on eBay (you can guess who most of his patrons are). Nonetheless, this hasn't stopped Chris from blowing literally thousands of dollars on children's toys. Naturally, his "art" and photographs are only really of any value to trolls, and thankfully few people have been foolish enough to give him hand-outs. Which is for the best, given that he may finally be forced to face a situation his mother can't bail him out of, and maybe, just maybe, learn something from it. Or not.
Chris began identifying as a lesbian in August 2014, and denied that there is no such thing as a male lesbian (citing Yahoo! Answers as proof). While he seemed to soften his stance on gay men (very reluctantly), he also indicated that he hated his own duck, in addition to his pre-existing hatred of pickles in general. Chris also took up swanning around attending LGBTQ events around Charlottesville, including attending a Halloween party at a gay bar dressed as a lesbian from the 70s. At such events, he obviously mingles with people infinitely more accepting and kind than himself. This necessarily will result either in Chris becoming a better person or in Chris being banned and ostracized from these gatherings. If history suggests a single thing, it is that the latter scenario will occur.
In July, Chris claimed to have a girlfriend by the name of Catherine. Needless to say, many doubted it would last. Sure enough, in early November, it was confirmed that Catherine was yet another troll persona. This has led to an outpouring of disappointment and disgust from many of his unappreciated abettors, who were hoping that, for once, Chris had got lucky. It is unclear, but likely, that she was the same woman mentioned above who was dating him in July.
This glimmer of pity was extinguished in December, when Chris violated a ban and assaulted an employee in an outing to GameStop on Boxing Day. He assaulted the store's Assistant Manager, who was calling security, with mace; showing that, again, Chris has yet to learn anything from his mistakes, if he even regards them as mistakes to begin with. Only time will tell how much trouble Chris has landed himself in this time, but given his current financial status and history, it can't be good. Needless to say, Chris has no one to blame but himself for this mess, which isn't to say he won't try.
Transgender Era
In January 2015, Chris asked people to start referring him with female pronouns, and subsequently caused another ruckus at Walmart. More generally, 2015 saw Chris slowly shy away from his traditional bigotry towards men and homosexuals (while still keeping up his ludicrous crusade against Sega over the color scheme of a certain cartoon hedgehog and dramatizing his experience with trolls), and finally develop enough self-awareness to try and know himself. He indicated in several Facebook posts that he was still trying to gauge his own sexuality and sexual identity; for some time, he yo-yoed between wanting to remain a transvestite and wanting to transition into womanhood.
Chris performed the sequels to some of his greatest hits in 2016:
Original | Sequel |
Recycling | Chris's Specimen Sample |
For Julie's Eyes Only | Lesbian Sex Audition |
Carlos Chantor | Stephanie Bustcakes |
Un-clit | Self-inflicted taint wound |
In addition, Barb was sued by two banks, due to failure to pay over $20,000 of debt, kicking off the Financhu Crisis, in which she and Chris both begged for money like jackasses, while their hoards were clearly visible behind them. The Business saga was suspended when Chris was banned from Etsy for failing to send orders. He continued to duck responsibility for his inability to put down the PS4 controller long enough to slap together his preschool-level arts and crafts, choosing to blame Lulu for being "the bugger that bit my ass bad and killed my creative groove".
His Oedipal complex veered into disturbing new levels when he freely announced that he dreams about having sex with his mother. He also made multiple death threats against political figures Donald Trump and Mike Pence.
In 2017, the Financhu Crisis continued to stress the Chandlers. Chris offered pieces of his late father's stamp collection, the Sonic Totem and The Classic for sale in order to afford more toys, a $400 gold necklace for Barb, and the extremely costly expenses for his raffle prizes. He and Barb also continued begging. One of his friends from The End Games Pokémon Club grew concerned and gave him solid advice on how to apply for work through Virginia's DARS program – and in true Chris fashion, instead of following it, he went on an angry tirade. Later in the year, he was sued for failure to pay a debt to Mariner Finance.
Chris rediscovered Twitter in March. His frequent tweets to voice actresses lead to the Doopie saga – in which he was chastised for calling her darling, but doubled down on it and was subsequently blocked by her – and getting blocked by My Little Pony VA Tabitha St. Germain due to her getting constantly tagged by Chris and the weens orbiting him. He created sockpuppet accounts NightStar2891 to plead his case and TwiSparLicious to ban-evade, which failed.
He briefly joined the Kiwi Farms forum under the name LegendaryChristorian and held a Q&A session.
A high point for his social life was attending BronyCon, at which he enjoyed attention from fans. He also attended LGBT events such as UVA Remembers Pulse (where he was interviewed on TV), Cville Pride (where he was photographed by news in crowd shots), and Love is Love.
Chris resumed the Business saga halfway through the year by going back to work on the Sonichu #11 comic he had abandoned in 2015, by placing pages behind Patreon. He also again offered books for sale, self-published by Lulu, was paid to be interviewed by Merryweathery and CopperCab, and joined Redbubble. After eight years, he finally completed #11, and moved onto #12, which he completed after a few months. He began work on Sonichu #12-9 and Sonichu #15, but got distracted. His Patreon efforts also began to languish around October, when patrons complained that he hadn't been sending out books.
Another sweetheart saga took place in the fall. Jessica Quinn, a long-time white knight, suddenly turned troll by pretending she had fallen in love with him. She broke up with him twice, the first time he cried on camera for her to take him back, and the final time, he raged on video against the trolls he thought were to blame. He recovered quickly after drowning his sorrows at an ice cream shop.
Goddess Era
After having his heart shattered yet again, another troll, the mysterious Idea Guy, began to influence Chris by slipping hidden messages, often based on Nazi references, into the Sonichu canon thanks to an in-depth effort to manipulate someone who was very clearly mentally ill. While under the influence of the Idea Guy, Chris began spending time with members of the Teen Troon Squad who attempted to influence the Sonichu lore through involving themselves in the Dimensional Merge; along the way, a second Idea Guy appeared in order to feed into Chris's delusions. Chris was braiwashed into believing several things about himself, such as the idea that he was bisexual and half-Sonichu, which ultimately culminated in Chris developing a Messiah complex derived from his own delusions about the nature of reality and the lore of Hyperdimension Neptunia.
When it was learned that the Idea Guys were extorting Chris, who was already facing financial difficulties, a group of Kiwi Farms users joined forces to intervene. The Guard Dogs, led by Joshua "Null" Moon, were able to expose the two Idea Guys and excise their control over Chris's life; these actions effectively caused the breakup of the Teen Troon Squad once they realized that they would also be in deep shit if they kept it up. (Unfortunately, charges against the Idea Guys never got very far.) Chris has since repeatedly denounced the trolls for their actions, but unfortunately the situation was much more complicated than that. While the actions of the Guard Dogs prevented any of the new batch of trolls from further exploiting or otherwise humiliating Chris, the damage was done: Chris bought into the fantasy that he was a goddess as a new coping mechanism, and his psyche's already-shaky grasp on reality has hit rock bottom.
Chris's new beliefs led him to seek a hippie makeover befitting of his supposed psychic prowess, and he retreated further into his fantasies, generally refusing to engage with people who wouldn't entertain them. Chris eventually turned on Null, thanks to the influence of other trolls – chief among them, Jacob Sockness, who sought to sexually exploit Chris. The Guard Dogs realized that there was nothing that they could do for a Chris who refused to listen, and disbanded, but a new group, known as the Watchmen (who enabled some of Chris's fantasies out of pragmatism), sought to keep Chris from further embarrassing or endangering himself, successfully getting him away from Sockness.
Throughout all of this, Chris's belief in the Dimensional Merge has not wavered. When it didn't arrive on the prophesized date of November 18, 2018, Chris did what all doomsday cultists and religious fundamentalists did whenever the apocalypse didn't happen: push it back again and again. Not helping matters was the advent of COVID-19, which Chris saw as a sign of the Dimensional Merge's progress alongside all the other insane crap that happened in the year 2020. For Chris, things really took a turn for the worse when BABSCon got cancelled, and he began an elaborate coping scheme to live-action roleplay as Sonichu until he could attend My Little Pony conventions again, which will not happen until 2022 at the earliest. So far, Chris has spent over two-thirds of a year pretending to be his original character, with very few interruptions.
Future
After nearly a decade of a slow downward spiral in nearly all aspects of his life following Bob's death, Chris-Chan's future does not look particularly bright. The Chandler family debt has been steadily rising largely due to Barb and her son's poor spending habits, and even when she finally dies, the situation will arguably get worse for Chris with nobody to ground him in reality. Chris is virtually unemployable in any career after years of having every detail about his past leak out to the internet and never making a real effort to get a job after his brief stints working at fast food joints or retail.
14 Branchland Court will likely be foreclosed upon and potentially condemned in an effort to resolve the Financhu Crisis, leaving Chris without a home. His options from there are to either try to seek out another family member to live off of, get into assisted living, get committed to a mental hospital, or live on the streets, some of which are better than others but none of which are ideal for him. This is also to say nothing of his mental or physical health, both of which will continue to decay unless Chris actually makes moves to improve his life. In any case, Chris's story is one that seems fated to not have a happy ending, with his life perhaps serving as a cautionary tale in the age of the internet.
Aliases
Christian Weston Chandler has a wide array of names he has given himself. He was born Christopher Weston Chandler, but changed to "Christian" at the behest of the "mall conductor bear". In either case, he answers to "Chris" and "Chris-Chan". Unusually, Chris would often refer to himself by his full name, or if he's feeling especially formal, "Christopher Christian Weston Chandler". He is unusually proud of his initials "CWC", and often incorporates them into his creations and various puns on the word "quick". Examples include CWCville, A CWC Audition and CWC Dare.
Shortly after declaring himself a transgender lesbian, Chris started introducing himself as "Christine". In May 2016, he successfully filed for another name change to "Christine Weston Chandler".[21] He then followed up by filing to alter the description for sex on his driver's license to female.[22] He now signs his name with "heart i's". Legal documents refer to him as Christine Chandler,[23] except for civil cases, in which he hadn't updated his name change information with plaintiffs.[24] This wiki, however, refers to him as Chris for consistency.
Chris's nickname in his high school Spanish classes was "Ricardo", and long after then he would still translate his own name to "Ricardo Weston Chandler" when writing or speaking in Spanish, likely due to his ignorance of the fact that you generally don't replace your own name with something completely different when speaking in another language. At times he would go so far as to announce himself as "Christopher Christian 'Ricardo' Weston Chandler", or variants thereof, to identify himself precisely. In recent times, Chris has forgone stating his middle name, former names, and Spanish nickname in videos; now he usually leads with just "Christine Chandler".
Occasionally, Chris would use the names of his characters to refer to himself, most notably his evil twin, Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc, and of course, Sonichu. In his comics, Chris has the ability to transform into an Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, named Chris-Chan Sonichu. As Chris grew even more unhinged in 2017 and fell under the Idea Guys's sway in 2018, he would conflate himself even further with his fantastic inventions. Other modern names for himself include CPU Scarlet and Night Star, respectively his self-inserts for Hyperdimension Neptunia and My Little Pony. In contexts when he wants to be grandiose, he might append his various fictional alter egos to his name, much as he would list his former names in the past.
The only names commonly used to refer to Chris which he did not himself invent are "Chrissy" (popularized by Arjen Van Dierten) and Ian Brandon Anderson (popularized by Liquid Chris). Less notably, there is also "Solid Chris", used by some to differentiate him from Liquid in the tradition of a certain video game series. Certain A-Loggers have been known to refer to Chris as "Satan's Agent on Earth". Users of Kiwi Farms have coined the term "Classic Chris" to refer to Chris before the house fire and/or the Tomgirl Saga.
Featured fan video
CWC ~ A Sad Story | |
Stardate | 20 November 2009 |
Made By | IBAClydeCash |
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos |
See also
- Christian Weston Chandler (comic character) – Chris's depiction of himself within his own comics.
- Chris-chan Sonichu – Chris's furry alter ego.
- Hundreds of personal photographs assembled for use in Chris's autobiographical DVD.
- User:Christianchandler – Chris's own CWCki account
Sources
- ↑ Re: We've been found AND mocked horribly! :( - The Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia post where Chris reveals himself (archive from 4 Aug 2011)
- ↑ [[1]]
- ↑ [[2]]
- ↑ File:Miss Cherry asks Chris about his marriages.png
- ↑ https://archive.fo/v5aVW
- ↑ Internet_Dream_Lounge#Outro_.281:12:27-1:16:25.29
- ↑ Confirmed by placement in the Therapeutic Docket
- ↑ https://web.archive.org/web/20201210113452/https://kiwifarms.net/threads/what-will-happen-when-barb-dies.10000/page-96#post-1853572
- ↑ Chris Destroys His Vibrator
- ↑ CWC with Bible - Leviticus
- ↑ 11.0 11.1 11.2 User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992
- ↑ 6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3
- ↑ Aspergers (CWCipedia article)
- ↑ Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 4
- ↑ Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007
- ↑ Sonichu #7, [3]
- ↑ DVD, graduation note 2
- ↑ Story of My Current Days#Story of My Current Days
- ↑ Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 10.
- ↑ http://web.archive.org/web/20071107074539/http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1
- ↑ https://web.archive.org/web/20201210114511/https://kiwifarms.net/threads/chris-filed-for-a-legal-name-change-update-the-judgement-is-in.20763/
- ↑ File:Christine license.jpg
- ↑ File:Trespass case 2018.png
- ↑ Image:Court Record - 2019 Midland Funding Debt Case, Garnishment (Chris, GV18000451-01).png
External links
Christian Weston Chandler at the Internet Movie Database
Chris and... |
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